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WhyDid Wisdom: Get In Where You Fit In

By |December 27th, 2012|WhyDid Wisdom|

Four years (and a month) ago, I sat at my desk in my grey cubicle in my grey carpeted office and stared at an Excel spreadsheet while my eyes began to cross and water.  I spun around in my lopsided pleather chair- certainly an original piece of furniture from the early nineties- and nearly toppled over a pile of Hanky Panky holiday samples to see my friend, Stephanie, grinning at the entry of my own personal hell.  “Ready for lunch?” she said.  I nodded too quickly.

Spending half an hour across the street at Devon and Blakely with her over a cup of lentil soup was basically the highlight of my days.  While I had a job that most girls would consider a “dream job,” I found myself struggling to excel.  I was disinterested for the most part aside from the actual selection of product and styling of pieces.  The entering of orders, tracking of shipments, and balancing of budgets was the majority of my role and I just was not what one might consider a “star employee.”  I constantly felt guilty for not feeling giddy about my job and tried my best to be a superstar, but I was just not meant to sit behind a desk and crunch numbers.  One day, one of my colleagues actually voiced that.  She turned to me in a buyers’ meeting and said, “Kirsten, you’re too funny and pretty to be here.  You should go enroll in acting classes or something.”  An actress I’m not, but I was made aware at that specific moment that everyone knew I didn’t fit in the corporate world.  I hung in for another year and a half before that whole recession thing happened and retail took a beating forcing many offices to eliminate entire departments and completely restructure their corporate offices.  Stephanie and I were unluckily, or luckily depending on how you look at it, part of the trimming of the fat.  We weren’t alone though.  Ever see a bar full of buyers getting hammered before noon?  Dive bars have never made so many martinis.

kirsten smithFortunately, before all of the chaos, I had been on a double date with a girl who informed me she was a “blogger.”  She was a very nice girl, but not particularly brilliant or earth shatteringly interesting.  I thought to myself, “I can do that.”  The next day, I signed up for a Tumblr account and bought the domain WhyDidYouWearThat.com.  The idea stemmed from seeing so many girls wearing so many horrific outfits, namely leggings as pants.  When I started blogging I hadn’t the slightest clue as to what I was doing.  Fortunately, I had a college pal who was instrumental in setting me off in the right direction.  Should I ever hit it big time, he’ll be the first person I write a check to.  I wrote my posts anonymously.  Honestly, I didn’t think anyone was even reading them.  I was writing as a creative outlet to balance out all of the arithmetic of my daily tasks.  I had totally forgotten how much I enjoyed writing.  Instead of having conversations with myself in my head, I started writing all of my thoughts down.

Then something funny happened.  I started seeing my hits go up and up and up on Google Analytics.  People were reading this?  My Facebook page started growing.  Strangely enough, people were paying attention.  Almost a year or so in, I wrote a post that was quite a bit more personal than my typical WTF?! posts.  I even included photos of myself, which I hadn’t really done before.  My hits spiked and I realized that I had cracked the code.  I realized that I was able to connect with readers on a more personal level.  I could communicate with them without polarizing them.  We could commiserate.  We could laugh.  We could cry.  We could think.  We could be girlfriends… even though I don’t even know most of them.  I wanted women to know that there is someone out there dealing with the same problems as they are: whether it be finding the perfect hair product, or clever way to hide bra straps, or heal a broken heart.  I wasn’t here to make them feel bad about all the clothes and stuff I have that they didn’t (which I don’t have).  I wanted to be a safe place, a fun place, a release from a shitty day at the office with an Excel sheet and bitchy clients.

leggings are not pantsAnd while I was kind of forced into figuring out what I loved doing by being fired, it wasn’t easy.  I tried to get jobs after being laid off.  I got a few, but they weren’t particularly fulfilling or long lasting.  The jobs I would have wanted, I couldn’t get.  I was either overqualified or didn’t have the “right” experience to get them.  So, I realized that I just needed to put my head down and focus on creating something for myself.  Sure, I have a long way to go and I’m still learning even now.  I had no idea four years ago when I wrote my first post that this was what I was meant to be doing.  It was just a silly whim that grew legs and started sprinting.  There have been times I’ve wanted to quit, but I believe everyone feels that way at one point or another.  I get frustrated that I’ve worked hard for years and still have not made it to where I want to be and some bloggers have just walked onto the scene and been scooped up by agents and brands and critics.  When I see that happen, I get discouraged.  I start to think maybe I’m no good.  However, when I really think about throwing in the towel, I think about my readers.  I think about all the kind comments and emails and the friendships that have come from doing what I do.  I think about how much I really do enjoy writing and here I am.

So as to not make this all about “me” (you’ve got to be a little narcissistic to be a blogger afterall), I want you to know that sometimes when you are being rejected left and right and nothing seems to be working, it isn’t because you aren’t good enough.  Maybe it’s just life’s gentle nudge telling you that there is something else for you.  Maybe you just need to dig deep and figure out what you love and what your true calling is.  Don’t feel bad because you aren’t fitting into that round hole if you’re a square peg.  Know that you are just being pointed in the right direction and always know that there is a safe place for you here.

Thank you for four amazing years.

xx,

WhyDid

 

The List Volume 1/20

By |January 20th, 2012|The List|

I was not kidding about that pony.  I feel that in honor of my birthday, I should suspend the usual snark fueled list in order to honor some things that make me giggle with glee.  So, here are ten of many in no particular order.

  1. Benetint. I don’t know how else I can say it.
  2. Crispy rice spicy tuna.
  3. Have I ever told you about Smitty
  4. Love.  Surprisingly enough… I love love.  So hard.
  5. Prosecco.
  6. My beloved friends… though I often have to Photoshop us into the same place for us to all be together. 
  7. Shiny things and chandeliers.
  8. Classic television, ie; Golden Girls, Cheers, Who’s the BossDesigning Women, Full House, The Nanny … (yes, I’m old).
  9. My pink HB cashmere robe.
  10. Any good reason to celebrate and deck myself out.

Happy birthday to me (and the rest of you Capriquarius kids).

xx,
WhyDid

Gift Guide: Le Geek C’est Chic

By |November 30th, 2011|Gift Guide|

If you can’t beat em… join em.  Since, we’re clearly overly socialized and technology is only going to get more intense from here, might as well look good while we’re surfing the web/catching up on reading/chatting with friends/etc.  You know how I know tech is a big deal?  Go to one of your favorite fashion shopping sites… I’m willing to bet they now have a tab under accessories that says, “Tech Accessories.”  I would, however, like to point out that there are few and far between (if any) accessories for the Blackberry.  Coincidence?  … Anyway, a gift that is certain to delight even your most tech savvy friends is something to outfit her favorite electronic device.  Since it will probably spend more time on the table than hidden in the depths of her bag, it’s going to need to look good too.

1. Jagger Edge The Montana Studded iPhone Case, $99, 2. Jimmy Choo Glitter iPad Case, $495, 3. Juicy Couture Synched to the Stars Ear Buds, $47, 4. Henri Bendel Snake iPhone Cover, $68, 5. Marc by Marc Jacobs Stacked Heart USB, $42, 6. Diane von Furstenberg Heart Print Ear Buds, $25, 7. Jagger Edge Studded iPad Case, $198, 8. Balenciaga Arena Classic Screen, $565, 9. Echo Cheetah Touch Gloves $38

xx,

WhyDid

 

Setting the Mood: A Life Wrapped in Cashmere

By |November 28th, 2011|Setting the Mood|

I may be what some call a “snob” when it comes to knitwear.  You can thank Henri Bendel for that.  You see, I had the pleasure of working in the product development/buying department of their private label knitwear.  While, they sell silk and merino wool sweaters as well, there really is nothing quite like the soft sumptuous hand of cashmere.  Once I’d gotten my hands on it, there was no turning back for me.  I’m not sure if anyone has ever said it before but I will gladly be the first to say, “If it’s not cashmere, I can’t be bothered.”  After experiencing all that is cashmere, I couldn’t imagine wanting to wear anything else.  Bendel’s, quite famous for their cashmere, spun this fine fiber into the likes of pajamas, pillows, blankets, slippers- you name it, it was cashmere.  They have since downsized, but I kind of feel like a life wrapped in cashmere is how the good Lord intended it.

xx,

WhyDid

 

Sweater: Henri Bendel Cashmere V-Neck, $158

Scarf: Artemis Wragge The Gossamer Cashmere Scarf, $355

Arm Warmers: Donna Karan Ribbed Cashmere Arm Warmers, $450

Jumpsuit: Crumpet Flared Cashmere Jumpsuit, $670

Why Not Play Head Games?

By |August 4th, 2011|Beauty Buzz|

The summer is nearing its end, but it’s not going out without a fight.  The heat can be unbearable when trying to figure out what to wear- or what to do with your hair.  Speaking from experience, I know what type of havoc humidity and heat can wreak on one’s dome piece.  When all else fails, disguise that crazy fro with some cleverly placed hair accessories.  It will distract folks from whatever madness is going on from the neck up.

Might I suggest slopping some heavy conditioner on your fried tresses and tying them back in a sleek bun?  (I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t done this on more than one occasion).

1. Forever 21 Braided Rosette Headband, $4.80, 2. Belle Noel Honey Hexagon Hair Comb, $35, 3. Henri Bendel Debutante Studded Hair Tie, $58, 4. Urban Outfitters Studded Leather Bun Holder, $14, 5. Forever 21 Braided Peacock Feather Headwrap, $6.80, 6. Jennifer Behr Swarovski Encrusted Skinny Headband, $225

While we are all getting hyped up on hair candy, let’s not lose our heads.  You know my thoughts on feather extensions (NO) and I feel the same way about these crazy forehead straps parading as headbands.  Another rule of thumb- If Aubrey O’Day is doing it, you probably shouldn’t be.

Now go on and have a good hair day.

xx,

WhyDid

 

Photo via Elle.com