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The List Volume LXXIII

By |May 11th, 2012|The List|

glass half fullSince it’s clear that focusing on the negative does nothing but breed more negativity, I feel that it’s important to also discuss the things that make my little black heart sing.  You know, the things that bring me back from the ledge.  So, until further notice, the list will be split in two.  Pick your poison.

sad face banana

  1. Realizing that being born in 1991, makes you 21.
  2. Getting rejection letters from jobs I didn’t apply for.
  3. Streaky highlights.
  4. Fifty Shades of Grey (the trilogy).  For fifty or more reasons.
  5. Unfriendly hostesses.  I’m fairly certain that 88% of your job is smiling and being helpful.

pork luncheon happy face

  1. Spending time in a toy store.
  2. Wallpaper.  I’m itching to wallpaper something.  Anyone have a spare wall in need of paper?
  3. Standing under the steaming water of a shower just cause it feels nice.
  4. Taking all morning to eat my breakfast/drink my coffee.  Life is lovely at a leisurely pace.
  5. Happy birthday to Blake and his beautiful mama, Devan.  I can’t believe it’s been a year since you joined the party, little dude!

Until next time…

xx,

WhyDid

 

images via Doobybrain & Bananas.AreAwesome

The List Volume LXXII

By |May 4th, 2012|The List|

ichat puppiesThey say you’ve gotta take the good with the bad and I’d say that’s a pretty good rule of thumb.  After all, not everyone’s life can be candy coated kisses and sparkly sprinkles all the time… nor should it be a constant shit storm.  That’s where the intricate balancing act of life comes into play.  It’s not always easy, trust me, I know.  I’ve been a little negative lately.  Weird.  No, but seriously, I’ve been a real Sally Sad Sack and while I won’t completely deprive you of my weekly rant, I do fully intend on counterbalancing it with equal parts sunshine and kitty cats.

rain cloud

  1. The “gentleman” who sat next to me on my flight wearing a tank top (mank top?).  Fine, I get it.  I see I’m not gonna win the mank top battle, but please, for heaven’s sake, save it for the beach or the gym… or put on a cardigan??
  2. Coffee grounds at the bottom of your cup.  A perfectly good way to ruin a perfectly good cup o’ joe.
  3. Tanning beds… can I offer you a smoke as well? patricia krentcil
  4. Waking up with unidentified bruises… leaving me looking like I mighta had a rough night on the main stage.
  5. Living out of a suitcase.

rainbow

  1. Living out of a suitcase.
  2. Having the best friends a girl could ask for.  Good enough to miss ’em when we’re apart and good enough that they still love me through my shit storms in hopes of the next rainbow.
  3. I’m late to the party, but this never gets old.
  4. A warm and freshly washed towel awaiting me after a shower.
  5. A bed full of dogs.

Seeing as it was easier to write the “good” than it was the “bad,” I think I’m well on the way to recovery… whatever that means.

xx,

WhyDid

The List Volume LXXI

By |April 27th, 2012|The List|

greener grassYou know what they say, “The grass is always greener on the other side.”  I’d say this most commonly refers to relationships seeing as when we are in one, we’re curious about what else is out there.  When we aren’t in one, we’re desperately trying to settle down and settle in.  The upsides of being in a relationship are quite clear, but what about all the perks that come with rolling solo?  It’s not such a bad thing, after all.

Ten things that do NOT suck about being single:

  1. It’s very difficult to argue with yourself.  (Though it can be done).
  2. The toilet seat is always in the correct position and there’s no longer the chance of falling in during a middle of the night tinkle break.
  3. I don’t care.  I do what I want!
  4. You can watch whatever the hell you want (whenever you want).  Golden GirlsGossip Girls?  It’s your world, girl.
  5. Oh bikini waxes?  Sorry.
  6. Do you know how good it feels to stretch out horizontally across your bed?
  7. You are no longer at risk of morning sex.
  8. The only person’s shit you have to clean up is your own (okay, and maybe your dog’s).
  9. You will not get fat from eating things that boys like to eat.  Hello, Lean Cuisine!
  10. Girls’ night every night.

And while you may only be single temporarily, enjoy it.  Cause it’s only a matter of time before someone is crowding your space, stealing your covers, and breathing in your face.

xx,

WhyDid

 

image via Open Europe

The List Volume LXX

By |April 20th, 2012|The List|

instagram photosRemember how I said that one of the first things I do in the morning after opening my eyes is look at my phone?  Well, after checking any emails, texts, etc. (can’t stand any little red numbers), the next thing I do is head on over to good ol’ Instagram.  And I know I’m not alone (there’s a reason Facebook plunked down a cool $1B for the photo sharing app).  I love a stream of pictures (they are worth a thousand words, right?) as opposed to the banal status updates of Facebook and Twitter.  However, something bad has happened.  People are starting to abuse the right to post.  Just as some people talk only to hear their own voices, it seems some people post just to post.  When I speak, it’s because I have something to say.  When I post a photo, it’s because I think it’s actually worth seeing.  I think it’s high time we set up some Instagram sharing guidelines.  What say ye?

  1. Photos that you did not actually take.  That’s what Pinterest is for.
  2. Oh, your photo is kinda blurry?  Try taking another one.  If you can’t tell what it is, I most certainly can’t either.
  3. Let me preface this by saying, I like a good outfit post.  I like to see what you’re wearing (obviously) and understand that sometimes self photography is the only way.  The picture you took of yourself in the mirror with the flash on.  A). I can’t see your face, B). your mirror is dirty.  Flash off, friends.
  4. Your blue steel/duck lips face.  Just stop.
  5. Your vodka tonic.  Are there flames or smoke coming out?  No?  Don’t post it.
  6. I know that Some E-Cards are pretty funny, but are we done yet?  Can we relegate those to Facebook?
  7. I’m a sucker for animals and even post photos of my own pup, but 19 photos in a row of Wiggles is excessive (and obsessive).
  8. The same goes for babies.  I love your sweet little nugget, but at least put him/her in a silly hat or something.
  9. Your breakfast.  Unless it’s wild rhino on a spit, no one cares.
  10. Every single picture from your night out.  It’s called editing.  Pick a good one (two max) to share.

Oh, and if you are as obsessed with Instagram as the rest of us and you think your photos are stellar enough to make a case for your phone, you MUST check out Casetagram.  Welcome.

xx,

WhyDid

 

image via NY Times

The List Volume LXIX

By |April 13th, 2012|The List|

broken record

Oh, why yes, today is Friday the 13th.  What a perfect day for things to suck!  I can barely even see straight so just writing this is going to be a feat in and of itself.  If there are type-o’s or I can’t quite form a cohesive sentence, deal with it.  I am.

  1. Having to pretend I care.  (pssst- I don’t).
  2. Men in tank tops.  Seriously, just stop. ed hardy man tank top
  3. The morning after.
  4. Having to break the news that your +1 has gone to +none.
  5. Sitting down at a desk to write this list and seeing this bitch staring back at me: sports illustrated irina shayk
  6. When your chapstick has melted unbeknownst to you and then you open it and start to apply it only to give yourself an at home wax.
  7. Picking up a drink and thinking it’s going to be one thing, say water, and it turning out to be something else, say vodka.
  8. Mushrooms.
  9. Applying so much eye cream that you look at yourself in the mirror midday and realize that your mascara is now on your cheeks.  Cool.
  10. Your face.

xx,

WhyDid