Sep
16
2014
0


WhyDid Wisdom: I Know What Boys Like

man filling out pollI have always tried to emphasize to my readers- because I know most of them are female and some of them are quite young- that taking pride in one’s appearance is certainly an extension of self worth, however, banking only on good looks is a serious gamble (hence, why I created Smart Is the New Pretty).  In tandem with primping and priming our exteriors we should also be grooming our interiors.  A shiny car is great until you slip inside only to find it full of garbage and leftover McDonald’s wrappers that even a Febreeze ad couldn’t cover up.  Sure, we’re careful about what we’re feeding our bodies (as we should be), but also being conscious of what we’re feeding our minds is what makes us complete packages.

I live in a city full of 400,000 more beautiful women than there are men.  Most people see only see Maybelline and Victoria’s Secret commercials on their television screens.  I’ve seen them in the flesh on more than one occasion, especially around February and September.  And even if you don’t live in a real time perfume ad, women all over the globe are constantly being bombarded by sexy sirens on TV, in magazines, and now even our Instagram feeds.  (Uh, belfies anyone?)  Here’s the thing: the women who stand out are the ones who can stand on their own.

Most of us still subscribe to women’s magazines or at the very least, “like” them on Facebook so as to have stories about losing those pesky extra five pounds, tips to make your man hot, and how to be basically perfect streaming into our lives on a regular basis.  Taking cues from Cosmo and other women who don’t know what men want any more than the rest of us seems like a case of the blind leading the blind.  I could tell you multiple tales of what not to do, but I decided to go straight to the source.  I asked actual men what they thought about certain things we wear and the qualities they find most desirable in women and the answers were pleasantly surprising.  Though they wouldn’t shock Susan Patton.

male modelsWhile this “study” couldn’t even come close to being considered “scientific” (although one of the classes I easily aced in college was chemistry), it does give a little insight into the male brain, which while complex is much more straightforward than our own female version.  To be perfectly transparent, my sampling really wasn’t that random.  It was a slightly homogenous mix made mostly of the men my friends and single ladies I know would like to date and probably pine over between sips of pinot on lonely Thursday nights.  They are the guys who would delight your parents should you show up to Thanksgiving dinner with one of them rather than that terrible ex of yours from college who only wore fleece vests and pleated chinos.  You know, the one who gave your younger brother an unsolicited course in the birds and bees after insulting your mother’s candied yams.  My pool of respondents are educated, successful, and worldly- not to mention handsome.  I suppose I also could have asked guys who frequent nightclubs because I know those guys too, but I don’t have their email addresses.  I can’t even be sure they have email or know what email is.  In any case, I compiled a questionnaire consisting of ten questions that can only begin to scratch the surface of what makes men tick.

When asked about their favorite outfit on a woman…

As I’ve often said, “Keep it simple, stupid,” or K.I.S.S.  This holds true for business and personal matters as well as your wardrobe.  Though answers to this question garnered some pretty scattered results including fitted jumpsuits, lace, sneakers with skirts, maxi dresses, and rompers (which were, ironically, listed as something we should stop wearing- but we’ll get to that), the answer that kept popping up included a variation of white tank/tee and jeans/jean shorts (here is an example of keeping it simple).  So, basically, your drop crotch Hammer pants and ruffled crop top are best left to be worn on a night out with the girls because your beau either did not notice, does not care, and as one of my respondents replied, is turned off by your wearing of labels.  Two other honorable mentions were the cult favorite, yoga pants, and his old t-shirt with a pair of boyshorts.

blue jeans white shirtAnd what we should stop wearing…

Animal print may be a continuing trend for fall, but don’t expect a man to fall for you when draped in pelts.  Sadly, many of the answers to this question happen to be some of our, as women, favorite trends.  As a matter of fact, many of the answers dealt with men’s distaste for women following fashion trends too closely.  The “arm parties” (can we stop calling them that yet?) that we so love are driving men crazy and not in a good way.  All of the clanking is not only creating an imbalance in arm strength for you, but also distracting and annoying him.  Wearing things that don’t fit your body (I have rephrased the answer much more eloquently than its initial iteration) and showing too much skin, namely cleavage are surefire ways to end a date early.  And that bit of underwear showing?  They hate that too but, don’t think that high waisted anything is going to be the cure all.  Last but not least, they may love you in jeans, but definitely not boyfriend jeans.

leopard-coatSo, who do they consider to be style icons?

Sorry, Miley Cyrus, men seem to be immune to your raunchy high cut leotards (not to mention antics) and Katy Perry’s cupcake cleavage seems to be lost on the male species.  As a matter of fact, one of the only young A-listers to be mentioned was Taylor Swift.  It would appear that most men who answered tend to favor classic (and covered up) beauties like Sophia Loren and Grace Kelly.  Other responses included Jackie Kennedy O’Nassis, Audrey Hepburn, Charlize Theron, Olivia Palermo, and the great Kate Moss.

audrey hepburn sophia loren grace kellyAnd regarding makeup: Done up or au naturale?

Save yourself some time and trouble when getting ready by paring back on the effort spent spackling your face in the bathroom mirror.  Though a few of the respondents preferred completely natural, most preferred makeup that looked natural, emphasizing your God given beauty, but not masking it with thick foundation and crazy eye colors.

Do they notice and/or care about our manicures and pedicures?  What about that leg stubble?

Sadly, and I can speak from experience, men do pay attention to details when it comes to our fingers, toes, and the limbs in between.  One respondent summed it quite well with, “It is the overall impression of being ‘together’ not any one particular aspect.”  Others said they notice, but would never comment on chipped nails or an unsavory shade choice.  As for unshaven legs, they were a bit more vocal.  Having a bit of blonde fuzz on or around your knees wasn’t a big deal so long as it didn’t imply that other regions may be overgrown as well.

whydid manicureWhat makes a woman attractive?

The beauty industry is $400 billion dollar industry globally.  We spend hundreds of dollars a month on creams that will rid of us wrinkles, painful procedures to banish unwanted hair, and makeup that guarantees to cover up any minor imperfection.  But what is it that really makes a woman attractive? Turns out, it’s not solely long lashes, flawless skin, or toned thighs.  What do men find most attractive in a woman?  Sorry beauty industry, but it’s brains.  From having a job and her own interests to a strong yoga practice and spirituality, it seems men are more interested in women who have their heads on straight.  Men find women who are interesting attractive.

On what makes a woman interesting…

Much like what makes a woman attractive, the most succinct answer was, “Her brain,” and that response was echoed and elaborated on time and time again.  Having a positive attitude, a sly smile, the ability to hold a decent conversation with well thought out opinions, and confidence were just a few.  A woman who has traveled on her own, can navigate a city solo, possesses her own style, and has something to add to a conversation or is able to teach others also makes her swoon worthy.  Having a little bit of “fire” doesn’t hurt either.

And what makes for a total dealbreaker…

We all have our dealbreakers when it comes to dating and mating.  These are the quirks that can’t casually be overlooked and just deemed cute.  While mine include things like lacking self awareness and wearing sports jerseys, men had some very specific responses to this one.  Interestingly, as one respondent pointed out, “Each [sic] woman is unique.  Something that is awesome about girl A could be a huge turn off for girl B.”  So, while one man’s dealbreaker may be another man’s aphrodisiac, here are some of the more interesting answers and it’s probably best to just bullet point these:

  • Drugs
  • Flirting extraneously
  • Wearing labels
  • Saying “like” too much
  • Seeing her read a celebrity mag
  • If she’s a bad kisser
  • Inability to manage money
  • Not having command of they’re/ their/ there and you’re/ your
  • Lack of common sense
  • Being outspoken with a low quotient for relevant and interesting content
  • No awareness of current events
  • Using “hahahaha” and “lol” in texts

One thing men wished women knew about them…

This question held some of the most valuable information in my opinion.  One gentleman wanted us to know that men aren’t as tough as we think they are and they stress about work and their need to provide.  Another added that they don’t think nearly as much as we do… about anything.  One pointed out that threats, ultimatums, and games aren’t effective because social media and apps like Tinder have leveled the playing field (Ouch!).  To soften that last blow, one response was, “Real men prefer a woman who values herself enough to be ‘hard to get.’”  Follow that up with, “Women please, as long as you’re being insane in your body desires, please, please, please move towards Misty Copeland and away from models/women who look like prepubescent boys.”  My favorite response came in the form of a video (below) and much like my YouTube experiences of getting sucked into hours of puppies, I watched several more videos by the same man, Mark Gungor (this one was life changing).

And luckily, men do know the difference between leggings and pants…

  • Leggings are just a single piece of fabric. kinda like thick tights. pants have some kind of discernible feature (pockets, zippers, etc)
  • Leggings are incredible for any situation but if we are going out to eat or somewhere special throw a pair of pants on please. Preferably leather pants.
  • I’m probably wrong but:  I feel leggings are tighter and comprised of a stretchy material.  Pants can also be tight, and stretchy, but not as stretchy as leggings.  I also feel like pants have seams and leggings may or may not.

 

xx,

WhyDid

 

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Aug
05
2014
0


Why Did You Wear That: Cover Your Bases
Written by: admin | Why Did You Wear That?

national underwear day peep showThere are times in life when one must practice a bit of discretion- like the times where my friends have to remind me that what I classify as “shirts” aren’t in reality and in “polite society” considered shirts.  They’re more like long line bralettes.  And honestly, if my bust wasn’t as robust, I might actually be able to get away with a bit more skin.  But alas, that is not the case, so I’ve had to take a quick course in Modesty 101.  This past weekend when I was informed that I would be attending a cocktail party with one of my best gal pals, her boo, and a guy I’d formerly hidden from, I packed one of my favorite T by Alexander Wang backless dresses and heels that I get stopped on the street about.  “Backless” more often than not is synonymous with “bra-less.”  As to not offend my friend, I also stashed one of my secret weapons that I acquired as a lingerie buyer, silicone nipple covers.  Sure, they aren’t exactly sexy (ever wanna look like a department store mannequin?), but they prevent corneal damage and idle cocktail party gossip.  That reminded me of all the little tricks of the trade that I was privy to and wanted to share with my fellow crop top loving cohorts.  Collect these Macgyver approved undergarments below and never let your nipples be the only lasting impression at the party… because it’s just not that kind of party.

calvin klein underwear1. Calvin Klein Underwear Naked Glamour Strapless Push Up Bra, 2. Fashion Forms Silicone Gel Petals, 3. The Natural Fashion Tape and Dispenser, 4. Joie Layering Slip Dress, 5. Commando Classic Thong, 6. Cosabella Never Say Never Flirty Bandeau Bra, 7. Free People Seamless Romper, 8. Les Coquines Anastasia Halter Bralette, 9. Only Hearts Second Skins One Ply Tube

xx,

WhyDid

 

 

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May
28
2014
0


Why Did You Wear That: Pajama Jam
Written by: WhyDid | Why Did You Wear That?

pajamas kirsten smithThough I rarely sleep with much on once the weather breaks from freezing, I have an overabundance of sleepwear.  As a matter of fact, for someone who would rather sleep with her window open for fresh air and sweat than turn on her air conditioner, it seems a bit excessive for the lack of closet and drawer space of New York studio apartments.  Despite living in what is essentially a large hotel room, my apartment has become a bit of a hangout, probably due to its convenient location to trouble.  Upon entry everyone always comments on the number of rompers and nighties that hang from the doorknobs of my closet… which aren’t there merely for show, but because I’ve got a bit of a textile overpopulation problem. It just so happens that they look nice and add a little bit of color and femininity to my black and white abode.  My pajamas are mostly seen by my girlfriends who catch me between showering and dressing for the day, delivery men, and my neighbors across the street who have seen more than their fair share of me.  But alas, with summer weekend getaways and shared spaces, it’s probably best to have something to sleep in more modest than your birthday suit and slightly sweeter than your old ratty college t-shirt and pair of boxers that came from who knows where.

sleepwear

1. Only Hearts Venice Cutout Romper, 2. Juicy Couture Print Sleep Essential Romper, 3. Eberjey Bleached Out Slub Jersey Jumpsuit, 4. Cosabella Bella PJ Romper, 5. Donna Karan Sleepwear Cotton Batiste Pajamas Set, 6. Eberjey Hannah Teddy, 7. Skin Lace City Chemise, 8. Equipment Landon Floral Print Washed Silk Pajamas, 9. Wildfox Couture Sleep In Late PJ Set, 10.Splendid Genie Jumpsuit

xx,

WhyDid

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Jun
14
2013
0


Friday Frocks (Except Not): One for the Money
Written by: WhyDid | Friday Frocks

Speaking of one pieces… this week let’s ditch the frocks for something less formal.  While a onesie can still be dressed up for a night out on the town, sometimes a gal needs a little coverage of the crotchal region.  Maybe you’ll be tackling the new Citi Bikes, or perhaps there are high kicks in your future, in any case, a little bit of modesty goes a long way.  What better way than in a jumpsuit or romper?  (Answer: there is no better way).

1.Splendid Cotton and Modal Jersey Jumpsuit, 2. findersKEEPERS By the Way Romper, 3. Lucca Couture Zipper Front Romper, 4. Emerson Thorpe Juliette Wrap Front Halter Jumper, 5. T by Alexander Wang Paneled Silk Crepe de Chine Playsuit, 6. Kimchi Blue Tie-Front Romper, 7. Dolce Vita Makayla Romper, 8. Young Fabulous & Broke Gracie Jumpsuit, 9. OAK Hooded Cotton Fleece Playsuit, 10. ONE by Novella Novella Jumpsuit

xx,
WhyDid

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May
20
2013
0


Setting the Mood: Getaway From Me
Written by: WhyDid | Setting the Mood

Memorial Day is fast approaching… so fast, in fact, that I didn’t even realize it was this weekend.  Guess who doesn’t have plans (yet)?  Who wants to pack me in his/her carry-on?  Anyone?

Well, for the rest of you well-organized individuals it’s time to start packing up and shipping out.  So, should you be heading to Malibu or Miami, your look needs to be beach chic, which basically amounts to looking polished without looking like you tried… not one bit.

Bop Basics Floppy Raffia Sunhat, Zimmerman Oasis Floral Print Cotton and Silk Playsuit, Ray-Ban New Youngster Sunglasses, Matiko Stacey Cork Wedge Sandals

Beach bound, baby!

xx,

WhyDid

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