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The List Volume XXXVI

By |January 28th, 2011|The List|

Ah yes, it is that time of the week.  The list.  It never ceases to amaze me that so many things can be so obnoxious.

  1. The post office. Why is there always a line? What is so difficult?
  2. Willow Smith in Vanity Fair. Isn’t she like two?
  3. Why does my yogurt have a twitter logo on it? I can’t click it. I also don’t want to follow you on twitter, yogurt.
  4. “Fashion” bloggers who can’t spell the names of designers.
  5. People who don’t know how to merge (the cause of all LA traffic).
  6. Greasy bangs. Ew. Just ew.
  7. Brain freeze.
  8. Friends with Benefits coming out right after No Strings Attached. How did the exact same movie get made twice? Like, who forgot to pass along that memo?
  9. Sleeveless turtlenecks. Um? Oxymoron, no?
  10. Charlie Sheen. Seriously, get. it. together.

xx,

WhyDid

Why Did You Wear That: There She Blows!

By |January 15th, 2011|Celebrity Style|

I mean, I can’t.  And I am fully aware that by posting this… I’m fueling the very problem I’m trying to extinguish.  All I really want is for Kim Kardashian to just. go. away. NOW.

Here is Kim at the Critic’s Choice Awards (why she is even there is beyond me).  I don’t know if I’m more horrified by the fact that her dress is mere breaths away from splitting at the seams or that Vera Wang is responsible for this monstrosity.  (I had to fact check this because I just could not believe Vera would be affiliated with any part of this).   While it is a departure from her standard spandex hoochie wear… the poor fitting of the gown just makes it appear vulgar.  Listen, silk satin isn’t for everyone, girl.

All I know is that they better have double stitched the back seam.

And with that, Kim K… be gone!

xx,

WhyDid

WhyDid Wisdom: Grasping At Straws

By |January 13th, 2011|WhyDid Wisdom|

While I tried to sleep last night with a dog curled around my left foot and a cat purring like a diesel engine in my right ear, I wasn’t particularly thrilled to wake up to a talking cat on TV this morning. That’s right, Salem from Sabrina the Teenage Witch was my wakeup call.  Seeing as our family zoo partied all night, I was far too tired to bother changing the channel before opening my laptop and sipping on my morning beverage. So, when the credits rolled for Sabrina, I still didn’t bother changing the channel.  I was too immersed in Twitter updates and Google Analytics to exert the extra effort.

Then something caught my ears:

“Everything you’re chasing is worth nothing.”

Some creepy spiritual infomercial was on, but this gentleman put into words something I have thought to myself many times.  Right before I moved to Los Angeles, I think I was guilty of this very same thing.  For so long, I had been putting emphasis on all the wrong things.  Things that just did not and should not matter.

I am no longer 22, bright eyed and naive, so why in the world would I still be chasing the same things?  The novelty of nightclubs and i-bankers and “celebrities” should wear off after a while, shouldn’t it?  When does one realize that  he or she is not a celebrity and is most likely not going to be receiving a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame any time soon?  Why on earth are so many people still grasping at straws and trying to “live the dream”?

Our culture has somehow tricked itself into thinking that we are all a whole lot more important than we really are.  With reality shows focusing on just about every topic under the sun and “stars” who are famous for adding nothing of value to humanity (talking to you Kardashians and Hilton), we all are under the impression that fame and fortune is just within reach.

The sad truth is that most people will never reach fame or fortune but will certainly exhaust themselves trying.  Racking up credit card debt to buy “things” that make them feel good temporarily and to be “seen” at places that will make them feel “cool” in that moment.  At the end of the day, none of this garbage matters.  It’s all just white noise.

The things that matter are much simpler.  Meaningful relationships, family, health, and kindess are just a few to start.  Unfortunately, for some, they may not even realize what’s important until it is too late. And alas, they’ll be the last one in the nightclub with cranberry stains on their clothes and the janitors mopping the floor. Alone.

xx,

WhyDid

The List Volume XXXV

By |January 8th, 2011|The List|

Sorry for the delay. Traveling from one coast to the other has a tendency to throw you somewhat off schedule. That being said, airports are a great place to gather annoyance.  Without further adieu, here is this week’s list in its regular format.

  1. Mr. Pibb instead of Dr. Pepper. You’re not fooling anyone.
  2. Overly plucked eyebrows.
  3. Jeans without pockets. They’re just about as bad as leggings in my book. Plus NO ONE looks good in them. I don’t care how cute your tuchus is. 
  4. Flameless candles. I mean, really? Aren’t those just called lights?
  5. Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez. I don’t know about you, but the last thing I wanted as an 18 year old young woman was a 16 year old boy.
  6. Ingrown hairs.
  7. Kim Kardashian’s nose 3.0. Stop preaching to little girls to “learn to love what they see in the mirror” when what you really mean is “make a sex tape that makes you enough money so you can afford to change anything you don’t like in the mirror.”
  8. Paying for luggage on airplanes.  Perhaps if you didn’t charge us, there wouldn’t be such a clusterfuck when it comes to the overhead bins.
  9. Self entitled undeserving people.  Know your role. And while we’re at it, slow your roll.
  10. Cankles.

xx,

WhyDid

WhyDid Wisdom: Own It, Guuuuuuuuurrrrl.

By |December 16th, 2010|WhyDid Wisdom|

The other day, someone asked me how old Ke$ha is and I didn’t know. So, of course, I had to look it up (I hate not knowing). While I found out that Kesha Rose Sebert is a mere 24 years old, I also learned some other fun facts about her. Kesha was raised by a single mother who was just barely able to get by. Kesha’s upbringing was so meager that the family relied on welfare and foodstamps for a period of time.  As I kept reading Kesha’s Wikipedia entry, I became more and more intrigued by her. I hadn’t really felt one way or the other about her until I realized that Kesha is not only smarter than she lets on, but she owns who she is and where she came from.  She’s strange, vulgar, and a little bit off her rocker, but all of those things make her who she is.

This, of course, got me to thinking.  Not many people are very comfortable with who they are.  It seems now that our culture is obsessed with being “fabulous” and keeping up the “right” appearance.  Our generation has racked up billions in credit card debt trying to “pop bottles” and wear the right shoes, right bags, right jeans. We want to drive the right cares and live in the right zip code. I just have one question: who’s to say what’s “right”?

Thanks to reality shows and people like Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian who are rich and famous for no good reason, people everywhere are just chasing the dream.  Heaven forbid you work hard to earn your living.  We are all pretending we’re on an episode of MTV Cribs or something.  Why can’t we just be happy with what we already have rather than maxing out the plastic trying to buy new identities? I have news for you. You aren’t Lauren Conrad and this isn’t The Hills.

When people ask me where I’m from, I tell them Wheeling, West Virginia. Glamorous? No. But I am proud of it and it’s part of who I am. Believe it or not, most people (who realize that West Virginia is actually a state and not just the western part of Virginia- see diagram below) are intrigued and start asking lots of questions.

It took a while for me to learn to accept all of the things that society tells me aren’t ideal about myself.  I’m never going to look like Marisa Miller, I probably will never own my own jet, and not even autotune is going to land me a hit single.  My brother, who is an artist, once told me I had a good face for painting because it is “unique.”  Before I could smack him, he explained that people with perfectly symmetrical faces are less interesting and easily forgettable.  Why do you think the world was so outraged when Jennifer Grey got a nose job? Same thing with Ashley Tisdale. Sometimes, the things that are “wrong” with us are the things that people find most interesting and attractive.  Everyone is trying to so hard to be different, yet trying to fit in one mold.

If everyone was the same- looked the same, liked the same things, dressed the same, had the same beliefs, the world would be an incredibly mundane place. So, instead of trying to change all of your so called flaws, why  not embrace them? Own it, girl.

xx,

WhyDid