Red Carpet Recap: American Snooze-ic Awards

By |November 24th, 2014|Celebrity Style, Red Carpet Recap, Why Did You Wear That?|

fergie jlo iggy azalea american music awardsOh, sorry.  I just woke up.  I can only assume that my deep slumber was induced around the same time I slammed my hand to my forehead upon One Direction taking the stage to accept the award for Artist of the Year.  Either that or I had too much wine.  Maybe both.  In any case last night was the 42nd annual American Music Awards held at the Nokia Theater in Los Angeles and hosted by a basically blacked out and slurring Pitbull (Mr. Worldwide, if you will).  While I look back on the evening, I can’t actually tell you who won or gush over any particular performance (except maybe Lorde’s), but there are a few key things I did deduce from the evening.  If you do not already own a leotard, get one.  Without a nary Beyonce, Miley, or Katy in the auditorium, there was no lack of spandex to be seen.  Also, J. Lo and Fergie made the message clear that the old guard hasn’t gone anywhere and a Pilates class sure doesn’t hurt.

As far as the red carpet, there were about fifteen “celebrities” who actually walked it, leaving my options for best, worst, and WTF very limited.  Black was the overall favorite for the evening and the ladies who donned the official color of New York, looked sleek, stunning, and sophisticated whether in long gowns or short shifts.  The skin showing of choice last night was most certainly the legs with sky high slits as well as micro minis.  Green, coral, a bit of navy, and peachy flesh tone were the favored hues worn by songstresses.  Rita Ora was pleasantly surprised to find out that she was the only one wearing a skin flattering yellow frock.

The favored hairstyle for the evening was soft tousled waves more often than not in buttery blonde.  Manicures were more like claws with long pointed tips not to be outdone by fingers covered in elaborate rings on multiple fingers.  Statement clutches and sky high heels finished off the ladies’ looks.

And we can’t forget the fellas.  Wyclef Jean and Imagine Dragons channeled their rocker style in tailored tees and leather, while Aloe Blacc spelled it out for us.  Nick Jonas’ suit made me feel even more awkward than his crotch grabbing Flaunt Magazine spread.  I quipped that I hoped 5 Seconds of Summer were also five seconds from a shower.  Magic looked like lost tourists who had wandered onto the red carpet after a tour of Hollywood Boulevard (rude!) and Sam Smith seemed to have forgotten his socks.

I wonder if Pitbull’s hangover is as bad as mine.

All But Basic Black:

american music awards red carpet black dressesCharlie XCX in Vivienne Westwood, Selena Gomez in Giorgio Armani, Fergie in Halston

jenny mccarthy amas red carpetMary J. Blige, Christina Milian, Jenny McCarthy in Cushnie et Ochs

 Little Babe Dress:

nicki minaj american music awards Nicki Minaj in Alexander Wang, Meghan Trainor in Ted Baker, Lauren Cohan in Blumarine

 Golden Coral:

jhene aiko american music awardsElizabeth Banks in Peter Pilotto, Julianne Hough in Zuhair Murad, Jhené Aiko in Alice + Olivia

 Flesh Take:

jennifer lopez red carpet american music awardsJennifer Lopez in Reem Acra, Selena Gomez, Morgan Stewart

Leggy Ladies:

kendall kylie jenner american music awardsKendall Jenner, Heidi Klum in Versace, Kylie Jenner in Alexandre Vauthier

Micro Trend:

becky g american music awardsBecky G, Lele Pons, Noah Cyrus

All That Glitters:

jordin sparks red carpet american music awardsJordin Sparks in Halston, Olivia Munn in Lanvin, Zendaya

Whatever Suits You:

iggy azalea american music awardsJessie J, Iggy Azalea, Gigi Hadid in Prabal Gurung

Ill Suited:

jonas neyo american music awardsNe-Yo in Anthony Franco, Ansel Elgort in Kent and Curwen, Nick Jonas in Armani

Male Order Babes:

imagine dragon american music awardsWyclef Jean, Imagine Dragons

 Leading Ladies ( DaBest):

taylor swift rita ora american music awardsKate Beckinsdale in Kaufman Franco, Rita Ora in Zac Posen, Taylor Swift in Michael Kors

Led Astray (Dafuq?):

worst dressed red carpet amaBleona Qereti, Frankie J. Grande, Diana Ross



Setting the Mood: Crashing Coachella

By |April 10th, 2013|Setting the Mood|

Every year, music fans flock to the desert to listen to their favorite bands and just cut loose.  This music filled phenomenon is called Coachella.  Now, for me, being subjected to large smelly, sweaty, intoxicated crowds is my worst nightmare realized.  I have a hard enough time navigating public transit.  However, there are some of you who live for these types of Woodstock wet dreams, so you’re going to need to dress the part.  Basically, this is your chance to live out your hippie boho dreams.

A few tips:

  • The dirtier/more careless you look, the better.  AKA: no shower, no problem.
  • Never use Paris Hilton as a style reference even though she continuously attends.
  • Pants are apparently optional.
  • Just please put on some shoes.

To be clear, not much has changed from last year.

Stela 9 Santiago Patchwork Backpack, Lovely Bird Biarritz Floppy Hat with Braid, Linda Farrow Metal and Watersnake Teashade Sunglasses, Acne The Pistol Brushed Leather Ankle Boots

I will not be seeing you there.



Would You Wednesday: Claws Are Out

By |September 5th, 2012|Beauty Buzz, Why Did or Why Don't?|

pointed nail trend 2012Nail art has fast become a girl’s way of expressing herself on the cheap.  Well, cheaper than a closet full of Lanvin.  Long gone are the days of the mundane Ballet Slippers and neutral nail.  We’ve graduate from glitter to full blown graphic designs.  But what happens when things go a little too far… as in too far from your cuticle?

celebrities pointy nail trendCelebrities from Beyonce to Fergie have been seen with nails that resemble those of Lee Press On’s gone rogue.  I was just hoping this would be one of those trends that catches on like wildfire in a rainstorm.  Sadly, it’s only gotten more popular and I’ve seen more than a few fashionistas walking around with sharpened claws.  As a matter of fact, the other day I saw a young lady with nails so long she could have retired her utensils and just speared her steak with her fingernails.  Better yet, they probably could have used her assistance back in the kitchen.  Here’s to hoping she doesn’t wear contact lenses and has an iPhone with Siri to transcribe her text messages.

Listen, I’m all for funky phalanges, but I’m worried girls are catty enough without claws.  What do you think of this extended trend?



Why Did You Wear That: Party Pants

By |February 29th, 2012|Celebrity Style, Why Did You Wear That?|

celebrities wearing printed denimForget your party shoes, this spring it is going to be all about your party pants.  In addition to bright bold denim, designers have shifted focus from fancy tops to fabulous bottoms.  Whether you pick floral, ikat, or animal, be sure to pair your party pants with a simple top.  Wear ’em during the day to bring some fun to ho hum errands or take ’em for a spin around the dancefloor just after midnight.

printed denim1. 7 for All Mankind Second Skin Legging in Kauai Floral, $189 , 2. Michael Michael Kors Ikat Print Silk Blend Pants, $175, 3. DKNY Floral Slim Pants, $225, 4. Paige Denim Skyline Ankle Peg in Chello, $189, 5. Current/Elliot Leopard Print Skinny Jeans, $270, 6. 7 for All Mankind Second Skin Legging in Garden Party, $189 , 7. Paige Denim Skyline Ankle Peg in Somersault, $189, 8. Balmain 3/4 Length Shorts, $1,025, 9. J Brand Floral Cropped Skinny Jeans, $203 , 10.  AG Adriano Goldschmied Stilt Cigarette Leg Jeans, $185

Party on.



Why Did You Wear That: Grammy Glory and Grammy Gross

By |February 12th, 2012|Red Carpet Recap, Why Did You Wear That?|

You know, the Grammy’s always manage to get my blood boiling.  Whether Lady Gaga is showing up as an egg or Snooki just shows up, it seems like this particular award show just causes everyone to lose their darn minds.  This year was especially tragic due to the loss of the great Whitney Houston, and I expected a much more subdued, somber affair, but despite the abundance of (I suspect unintentional) black on the red carpet, it seems the night carried on as usual.

grammys black dresses 2012Oh- hey black dresses.  I know that we all think you can’t go wrong in a little black dress (LBD), but it would appear that’s not always the case.  Now, I know Rihanna’s Armani “collaboration” was a showstopper, but let’s be real, while not offensive, it’s also nothing that me or one of my sorority sisters didn’t don at one of our date parties.  This slinky low cut number left me less than impressed.  Anne V (beautiful arm candy to beau Adam Levine), proved that an LBD can be anything but tasteful.  We get it, your gorgeous.  Now please cover your crotch.  However, Gwyneth Paltrow wowed in this tasteful yet unexpected Stella Mc Cartney.  That, my friends, is how an LBD is done.

grammys 2012 best dressedWithout spending too much time on the red carpet (and my head and heart exploding), let’s just get down to business.  Three ladies who I thought stole the show, or at least the red carpet, were Taylor Swift in Zuhair Murad and an unlikely chic bun updo (let’s forget about her Yeehaw Junction performace), Jessie J in Julien Macdonald, and Kelly Rowland in Alberta Ferretti.  This is how you do elegant glamour.

grammys 2012 worst dressedAnd with the good must come the bad.  While I have to say that I was blown away by the color and the detail of Fergie’s Jean Paul Gaultier get up, I had no interest in her oversized granny panties or “Grammies” as they were coined.  It’s a bit age inappropriate (and eye inappropriate), but had she chosen nude, tonal, or metallic undergarments, I might have been slightly less offended.  Katy Perry just needs to cut it out with her crazy colored hair (this combination has me thinking she’s gunning for a Smurfs sequel), and this Elie Saab dress leaves me longing for that ridiculous light up number she sported.  The most offensive by far, however, was Nicki Minaj in Versace.  I don’t care if you showed up with the pope.  This look will have you saying Hail Mary’s from now until eternity.  Why don’t you and Gaga just have a “weird off” and see who can outdo each other once and for all.  Kind of like a dance off with clothes.

Nonetheless, the Grammy’s was full of fantastic performances and plenty of fun… and while my blood pressure may have peaked… I’m certain I will tune in again next year just to get another glimpse of crazy.