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Why Can’t We Be Friends?

By |July 27th, 2011|Why Did or Why Don't?, Why Did You Date Him?|

Miss No Strings Attached in theaters back in January? No worries, you can catch it in theaters now… except this time it’s called Friends with Benefits – oh and they replaced Ashton and Natalie with Justin and Mila. No biggie. Not sure how exactly this slipped through the cracks with movie producers and studio heads, especially when all involved have worked so closely (Black Swan, That 70’s Show). You’d think at some point in between takes of the lesbian scene in Black Swan, Natalie might’ve mentioned something like, “You’re way better at this than Ashton. We’re doing a new movie together about these friends who have sex…”

And Mila would say, “No way!! JT and I are doing the same thing!”

Then they’d smack five and get back to business. Anyway, seeing that there are two major movies and four mega stars covering the sultry subject, I figured it must be something on the forefront of people’s minds. Just like the premise of the movies, having a “friend with benefits” (also known as a f*ck buddy), seems like a great idea in theory when in between relationships, but as everyone could guess (without having to sit through the movies or spend $15 a ticket) it never turns out quite the way you’d planned.

See it all gets a bit messy when one (if not both) catches stronger than “just friends” feelings. It’s nearly impossible for neither party to get attached when so much time is spent naked and in between the sheets. Sex is a very intimate thing and no matter how modern the woman (or man), sex is always more than just sex. I mean, let’s be serious, would you really sleep with someone you didn’t like… just a little? My verdict? Friends with benefits is always a bad idea.

Now, here’s the part where I bring it full circle by completely contradicting myself. I actually think the best relationships are built between people who have strong friendships. The trick is seamlessly transitioning from best buds to bed buds. The sexy part of relationships always fade (at least a little bit), but the sturdy foundation of friendship can keep a couple afloat.

So what do you think? Would you do the deed with a friend in need?

Whatever you decide, always be safe with your body and mind.

xx,

WhyDid

Monday Mash Up: Ex Factor

By |June 27th, 2011|Monday Mashup, Why Did You Date Him?|

It’s true, most people have a “type” which might consist of words like “tall”, “blonde”, or “athletic” but it’s very rare that someone has a type so terribly specific that it seems as though he’s dating twins.  Well, let’s give Reggie Bush a warm round of applause because he has take the term “type” to a whole new level.

Now, I swore I was done talking about Kim K on WhyDid, but this was too startling to ignore.  While Ms. Kardashian has clearly moved on from her breakup with New Jersey Nets player, Kris Humphries… (Have you seen her rock? Have you seen her registry?) It seems as though Reggie is stuck on repeat.  It raised eyebrows when he was rumored to be dating “model” Mayra Vernoica, but recently he stepped out with a lady so strikingly similar to his ex, Kim, that people started to wonder if this was merely a coincidence or totally creepy.

You may remember Melissa Molinaro from the Old Navy ad that had everyone talking about what a resemblance she had to the curvy Kardashian.  I remember her from the terrifically tacky but oh so addicting The Pussycat Dolls Present Girlicious.

So this begs me to ask: Is Reggie simply a man who knows what he likes or is he settling for a Kim K replacement?

xx,

WhyDid

Would You Wednesday: Take One for the Team

By |May 25th, 2011|Why Did or Why Don't?, Why Did You Date Him?|

A certain ample bottomed celebrity who will remain nameless (we have a zero tolerance policy here at WhyDid) recently announced her engagement to a 26 year old NBA basketball player.  I hate to be a naysayer when it comes to love, but this marriage has about the same chance of surviving as a snow cone does in hell.  Now, now… I know what you’re thinking: give the kids a chance.  I would like to be proven wrong, but the cards are stacked against them.

I, myself, have dabbled in the “field” of professional athletes.  While it was nothing serious, and my  heart was left unscathed, I realize now how naive I had been back then.  Seeing as I’m not an avid sports fan, when I’d met the gentleman I had no idea who he was, let alone his occupation (as a matter of fact I think he told me he was a DJ).  All I knew was that he was good looking and I was 21 and single in the city.  We lived far apart, so we didn’t see each other much.  I’d be a fool to think there weren’t at least twenty more of me scattered around the states.  But, alas, a fool I was.  It was flattering and fun to tell my girlfriends, so I continued to play the game.  I will never forget waiting downstairs for him after a game with the rest of the “wives” thinking A). how underdressed I was and B). how ridiculous it all was.  After seeing the girls hanging around hotels and stadiums, and garnering nasty glares from girls when we were out, it made me realize that all of this was a lot less innocent than dating your average frat boy.

I’ve heard countless stories and seen with my own pretty eyes athletes behaving badly.  (Perhaps even one such story involving the newly affianced).  Ample amounts of money and cleavage make for a deadly combination.  The odds are stacked against these athletes with groupies, gold diggers, away games, and schedules that are just not conducive to a healthy relationship. With 60-80% of marriages ending in divorce, NFL players are well above the national average (this statistic holds true for comparable sports).  I’ll be the first to admit I’m crazy jealous, so I’m not sure how pro-athletes’ wives deal with all the temptation awaiting their handsome hubbies.  Are the trips and shoes and status enough to make up for it?

Many couples have tried, but not many have been successful.  Have you seen an episode of Basketball Wives?  So, would you be willing to place a wager on such a dating gamble?

He shoots. He scores!

xx,

WhyDid

 

image via Baller Alert

Why Did You Date Him: Too Much. Too Soon.

By |May 12th, 2011|Why Did You Date Him?|

Have you ever met someone who came on so strong that it was off putting?  Kind of like walking into an elevator that wreaks of cheap cologne?  Makes you gag and want to exit immediately.  But it’s too late. The doors have already closed.  You’re stuck on the ride… at least for a little bit.

At our core, we all want to feel accepted, so when someone embraces us immediately, it can have a very ego boosting effect.  But be careful my beautiful beans…

Whether it’s a new friend or a new beau, opening up or offering up too much can be a big fat red flag.  When people give you so much of themselves and their lives so early on, it can be interpreted in a few different ways (none of which are good):

  • Desperate
  • Insincere
  • Obsessive


I have dated guys who gave me the keys to their apartments in the first two weeks of courting.  While in the moment it feels flattering and exciting, you’ve got to pump the brakes and ask yourself, is this too much too soon?  Well, let’s just put it this way, I’m not dating any of said key slangin’ gentlemen.  It’s fun to play house and it’s nice to feel wanted, but what on earth is the rush?  One of the fellows who so kindly bestowed upon me the keys to his domicile turned out to be incredibly possessive and controlling.  He wanted me to have his keys so he knew I would always be at his home.  It was like a serrated metal GPS.  Needless to say, those keys were deposited ever so kindly in a white envelope and returned to sender.

Guys aren’t the only ones who make unwanted advances in relationships.  Girls can also come on all hot and heavy giving you the feeling of “kindred spirits.”  These are the girls you need to watch out for.  Most likely, they don’t have a ton of “real” friends.  They have about 4 billion acquaintances though.  While they are fun to share laughs over a cocktail with, be careful of the information you share.  If your new gal pal wants to give a detailed outline of her befuddled past, let her.  Just don’t get caught up in the fun and lose your head.  All great relationships (platonic or romantic) take time and building of trust.  Who knows? A month from now you may realize you don’t even like the person.

Now when I meet people who are overly clingy, I’m a bit wary.  Not to say that I don’t like nice people.  There’s a huge difference between being friendly and being “emotionally slutty.”  I do not need to know your sexual past and we certainly don’t need to start naming our children within the first thirty minutes of meeting.  My friendships and relationships are very sacred.  I don’t let just anybody in and neither should you.

xx,

WhyDid

Why Did You Date Him: Ayo Technology

By |April 1st, 2011|Why Did You Date Him?|

Oh, hello there. Yes, I’ve been MIA for a moment or two, but much like a boomerang, I always return.  This time with fun news to announce soon. Anyway, we return to our regularly scheduled program in 3, 2, 1…

With Facebook driving up divorce rates, it’s clear Granny is shaking her head somewhere and we have entered another realm of dating hell.  We are long gone from the days of sock hops, corsages, and soda fountains.  Forget about opening doors and sending flowers.  We’re doing dating 2.0 and it’s not your grandmother’s dating.

Nowadays you can log onto sites like Ashley Maddison that will help you orchestrate an affair and there are more dating websites than you can shake a stick at. However, you don’t even need to go to such extremes to find love on the web.  Using social platforms like Twitter and Facebook you can connect with just about anyone on the planet.  All you need is access to a computer (with warranty that covers laptop repairs in Ipswich so you don’t miss a moment with your potential true love), internet connection, and hungry loins.

I remember falling prey to creeps “trolling” the internet back in the early days of Myspace and Facebook (thank heavens for privacy settings!), but guys aren’t the only predators on the internet these days.  Many girls “tweet” and “poke” at boys who catch their eye.  A lot of females are very forward and outright pushy when pursuing the objects of their affection.  By being so “easy” and available to guys, women are simply making it that much harder on themselves.  See, the more you chase the less trouble fellas go to in order to woo you and win your heart.  Kiss hand written love letters and picnics in the park goodbye.

I’m fairly certain that the internet is ruining dating, relationships, and worst of all, chivalry.  Forget only a phone call away.  It’s become clear that people are just a few key strokes away.  Ask me out via Facebook, Twitter, email, or DailyBooth and watch how quickly you’re unfriended, unfollowed, or sitting alone listening to the sound of crickets.

Would you take a gamble on internet lovin’?

 

xx,

WhyDid