Nov
24
2014
0


Red Carpet Recap: American Snooze-ic Awards

fergie jlo iggy azalea american music awardsOh, sorry.  I just woke up.  I can only assume that my deep slumber was induced around the same time I slammed my hand to my forehead upon One Direction taking the stage to accept the award for Artist of the Year.  Either that or I had too much wine.  Maybe both.  In any case last night was the 42nd annual American Music Awards held at the Nokia Theater in Los Angeles and hosted by a basically blacked out and slurring Pitbull (Mr. Worldwide, if you will).  While I look back on the evening, I can’t actually tell you who won or gush over any particular performance (except maybe Lorde’s), but there are a few key things I did deduce from the evening.  If you do not already own a leotard, get one.  Without a nary Beyonce, Miley, or Katy in the auditorium, there was no lack of spandex to be seen.  Also, J. Lo and Fergie made the message clear that the old guard hasn’t gone anywhere and a Pilates class sure doesn’t hurt.

As far as the red carpet, there were about fifteen “celebrities” who actually walked it, leaving my options for best, worst, and WTF very limited.  Black was the overall favorite for the evening and the ladies who donned the official color of New York, looked sleek, stunning, and sophisticated whether in long gowns or short shifts.  The skin showing of choice last night was most certainly the legs with sky high slits as well as micro minis.  Green, coral, a bit of navy, and peachy flesh tone were the favored hues worn by songstresses.  Rita Ora was pleasantly surprised to find out that she was the only one wearing a skin flattering yellow frock.

The favored hairstyle for the evening was soft tousled waves more often than not in buttery blonde.  Manicures were more like claws with long pointed tips not to be outdone by fingers covered in elaborate rings on multiple fingers.  Statement clutches and sky high heels finished off the ladies’ looks.

And we can’t forget the fellas.  Wyclef Jean and Imagine Dragons channeled their rocker style in tailored tees and leather, while Aloe Blacc spelled it out for us.  Nick Jonas’ suit made me feel even more awkward than his crotch grabbing Flaunt Magazine spread.  I quipped that I hoped 5 Seconds of Summer were also five seconds from a shower.  Magic looked like lost tourists who had wandered onto the red carpet after a tour of Hollywood Boulevard (rude!) and Sam Smith seemed to have forgotten his socks.

I wonder if Pitbull’s hangover is as bad as mine.

All But Basic Black:

american music awards red carpet black dressesCharlie XCX in Vivienne Westwood, Selena Gomez in Giorgio Armani, Fergie in Halston

jenny mccarthy amas red carpetMary J. Blige, Christina Milian, Jenny McCarthy in Cushnie et Ochs

 Little Babe Dress:

nicki minaj american music awards Nicki Minaj in Alexander Wang, Meghan Trainor in Ted Baker, Lauren Cohan in Blumarine

 Golden Coral:

jhene aiko american music awardsElizabeth Banks in Peter Pilotto, Julianne Hough in Zuhair Murad, Jhené Aiko in Alice + Olivia

 Flesh Take:

jennifer lopez red carpet american music awardsJennifer Lopez in Reem Acra, Selena Gomez, Morgan Stewart

Leggy Ladies:

kendall kylie jenner american music awardsKendall Jenner, Heidi Klum in Versace, Kylie Jenner in Alexandre Vauthier

Micro Trend:

becky g american music awardsBecky G, Lele Pons, Noah Cyrus

All That Glitters:

jordin sparks red carpet american music awardsJordin Sparks in Halston, Olivia Munn in Lanvin, Zendaya

Whatever Suits You:

iggy azalea american music awardsJessie J, Iggy Azalea, Gigi Hadid in Prabal Gurung

Ill Suited:

jonas neyo american music awardsNe-Yo in Anthony Franco, Ansel Elgort in Kent and Curwen, Nick Jonas in Armani

Male Order Babes:

imagine dragon american music awardsWyclef Jean, Imagine Dragons

 Leading Ladies ( DaBest):

taylor swift rita ora american music awardsKate Beckinsdale in Kaufman Franco, Rita Ora in Zac Posen, Taylor Swift in Michael Kors

Led Astray (Dafuq?):

worst dressed red carpet amaBleona Qereti, Frankie J. Grande, Diana Ross

xx,

WhyDid

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Aug
25
2014
0


Red Carpet Recap: MTV BMA’s

mtv vmas miley cyrus jesse beyonce blue ivyLast night marked MTV’s 31st Annual Video Music Awards and also the fact that I’m way too old to be watching it.  My friends and I kept exchanging puzzled looks as one unrecognizable (to us) tween took to the red carpet after the next.  I had never been so excited to see Gwen Stefani or Jennifer Lopez as I was last night.  Phew!  Somebody we knew.  It became quite clear as to why E! has cornered the market on red carpet pre-shows.  As I quickly found myself on the brink of a melodramatic meltdown, I yelled at my TV,   “Sway, WHO ARE THEY WEARING?”  After having cooled my rage with a glass of prosecco, the actual show began.

Within seconds of the opening act, I was concerned that Nicki Minaj had somehow pirated the entire event as there was much more booty on stage than on any ship.  She became this year’s Miley while pirouetting her posterior to her current single, “Anaconda”, which left me hoping Sir Mix A Lot was somewhere wiping his own rear with all the royalty money he received from that song.  She then joined Jessie J. who forgot her pants and Ariana Grande who appears to have a perma hairstyle for their song, “Bang Bang” complete with wardrobe malfunction.  She later joined Usher for his song, aptly named, “She Came To Give It To You.”

Right around the time I’d given up on humanity and started Googling how to obtain an Australian work visa, Miley Cyrus shocked audiences again. This time, however, it had nothing to do with flagrant twerking or her wayward tongue. When she won the VMA for Video of the Year, instead of accepting the award herself, her handsome mystery date took the stage.  He identified himself as “Jesse” and proceeded to deliver a touching speech revealing that he, himself, had grown up homeless which was hard to imagine as he looked like far less homeless than the boys of Five Seconds to Summer in his well tailored suit.  He encouraged viewers to learn more about My Friend’s Place and to get involved by visiting and donating on Miley’s site.

But (with a capital “B”)  Queen B., herself, Beyonce, was not about to be outdone.  Bey performed for a solid fifteen minutes in a stunning jewel encrusted leotard before accepting the Video Vanguard Award from her husband, Jay-Z and the absolutely adorable Blue Ivy.  If all those divorce rumors do have any merit, she should have picked up an Oscar as well.

The other big “B” for last night had to be for Balmain as Jordan Dunn, Chanel Iman, Joan Smalls, and Kim Kardashian all wore the label.  Pro-tip: Do not show up to an awards show wearing the same thing as a supermodel.  While Katy Perry and her date, Riff Raff, gave a nostalgic nod to Britney and Justin, everyone’s favorite good girl wore a romper so short, she could have been a Minaj backup dancer.  Black was a red carpet favorite, but all renditions from sheer paneling to leather pants felt fresh and innovative rather than basic and boring.  Red, pink, and blue were the other colors that were most prevalent, mainly in jewel shades.  While everyone looked “nice,” I didn’t feel floored by anyone in particular… except for Amber Rose, that is.

Ban-Do:

miley cyrus jourdan dunn mtv vmaJourdan Dunn in Balmain, Miley Cyrus in Alexandre Vauthier

Anything but Basic Black:

kendall kylie jenner red carpet chanel imanKendall Jenner in Alon Livne, Kylie Jenner in Alexandre Vauthier, Chanel Iman in Balmain

Power Couples:

ireland baldwin adam levine mtv vmaIreland Baldwin in Roberto Cavalli and Angel Haze in Helmut Lang, Adam Levine Behati Prinsloo

Sister, Sister:

beyonce vma red carpetBeyonce in Nicolas Jebran, Solange Knowles in H&M Studio

Fulfill Your Destiny:

mtv vma red carpetKelly Rowland in Kaufman Franco, Michelle Williams

Soft and Subtle:

mtv vma red carpetKesha in Johanna Johnson, Jessie J in vintage Halston

Silver Lining:

iggy azalea jennifer lopez red carpet vmaIggy Azalea in Versace, Jennifer Lopez in Charbel Zoe

Animal Instinct:

2014 MTV Video Music Awards - Arrivals Nicki Minaj, Charli XCX in Moschino

Red Alert:

mtv vmas rita ora demi lovato red carpetRita Orain Donna Karan Atelier, Demi Lovato in Lanvin

Double Trouble:

kim kardashian joan smalls mtv vmasKim Kardashian West in Balmain, Joan Smalls in Balmain

Pink Ladies:

gwen stefani chloe moretz mtv vmaGwen Stefani in L.A.M.B. Couture, Chloe Moretz in Louis Vuitton

Cobalt Queens:

sarah hyland julianne hough mtv vmasSarah Hyland in Kaufman Franco, Julianne Hough in Emilio Pucci

Singing the Blues:

katy perry riff raff taylor swift mtv vma red carpetKaty Perry and Riff Raff in custom Versace, Taylor Swift in Mary Katrantzou

 You’ve Got Chainmail:wiz khalifa amber rose mtv vma

Wiz Khalifa, Amber Rose in Laura Dewitt

 xx,

WhyDid

 

 

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Mar
07
2014
1


Why Did You Wear That: Body Party
Written by: WhyDid | Why Did You Wear That?

celebrity body jewelryWe’ve covered the bikini, the coverup and we already know how I feel about poolside footwear. Another not so obvious sunbathing accessory… that could potentially lead to some awkward tan lines, but you’re wearing enough SPF as to avoid that… is body jewelry. Specifically body chains. I have a couple of necklaces I next to never take off, but catapulting bling to the next level is the body chain worn with your bikini bod. It’s not as if you’re going to be doing laps like an Olympic swimmer and I’m willing to bet that if you’re anything like me, the only time you’ll subject your skin to a chlorinated public pool is when your dermis has actually reached the temperature right before incineration. Should you not be bold enough to bare your belly, another iteration is the hand chain which is another celebrity favorite at this very moment… and don’t you wanna be just like Beyonce?

body jewelry

 

1. Jennifer Fisher Rose Gold Plated Finger Bracelet, 2. Jacquie Aiche JA Disco Body Chain, 3. Noir Jewelry Double Ring Hand Chain, 4. Vanessa Mooney My Melody Body Chain, 5. Lioness Body Chain, 6. Vanessa Mooney The Noir Shoulder Body Chain, 7. Gold Tone Tiny Stud Body Chain, 8. Arme De L’Amour Gold Plated Finger Bracelet, 9. Lacey Ryan Ombre Stone Hand Chain, 10. Jennifer Zeuner Raquel Evil Eye Hand Chain

xx,

WhyDid

 

 

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Jan
31
2014
0


WhyDid Wisdom: Reserve Yourself
Written by: WhyDid | WhyDid Wisdom

annoying callerWinter is the time of year when many of us yearn to couple up in order to stay warm and potentially lower our ConEd bills. A lot of my friends are what could be considered professional daters. I’ve stopped asking what any of their chaps’ names are because I can’t keep up and would need a very elaborate flow chart in order to stay entirely in the loop. I’m always in utter amazement as to how they meet all of these fellas because most of my male companionship comes from my dog, gentlemen playing for the other team, and re-runs of Frasier. Ironically, I think I’ve just cracked the code as to my singledom with that last sentence.

Anyway, unlike myself, you’ve been hitting the town and getting hit on, you little minx, you. And in the mix of things, you’ve met a couple of cuties who have actually made it beyond asking for your number in between swigs of Jameson and you’ve spent a handful of cozy dinners and Saturday brunches at Extra Virgin and Cafe Cluny with one, maybe two, in particular. You knew it was meant to be when he ordered another round of mimosas and declared that there may be nothing better in this world than a great chocolate chip pancake except for maybe a hammock on Alphonse Island. In your mind, you’ve already started planning your June wedding at the St. Regis and have named your first born child due early next fall (you decided on something gender neutral and inanimate). You’re a perfect match much like Domenico and Stefano, so you can’t quite put your perfectly polished finger on why your affections, and text messages aren’t being returned.

Ready for an awful truth?

(You may need a quaalude and a seat for this). Okay, you know that one guy who continues to text you after countless subtle blow offs, blatant verbal abuse and finally virtual radio silence? You know… the one who tricked you into giving him your number after you said you’d just take his and then called himself from your phone. Yeah, that guy. Well, you may very well be that girl.

I know. It seems highly improbable, even mind blowing, that anyone male, female, or house plant could possibly resist your feminine wiles, biting wit, and Pilates body. But alas, as hard as it is to wrap your pretty little head around, you may have found the one and only human this side of the galaxy not interested in you or the Illuminati conspiracy theories.

Fine, maybe you didn’t bamboozle your way into his Blackberry (who still has one of those, by the way?), so let’s use another example. You know the sort of goofy handsome guy you went out with from Goldman Sachs? While he was perfectly nice and in “theory” should be a totally perfect partner completely capable of rearing healthy children and providing a stable lifestyle for your future family, there was just one problem. You didn’t feel any of that wild, crazy, I must have you more than this season’s Céline. He didn’t do anything wrong, per se. He was a perfect gentleman and has since then been hitting you up to have a second, third, and final date… before that wedding he’s planned in his head complete with future (already named) child.

Yep. It’s all starting to click isn’t it?

beyonceWe’ve all got a few of those guys lying around much like the Federal Reserve has a few spare bricks of gold. They’ll never get used, but it’s nice to know that they’re there for security’s sake and all. At one point, there were so many “code names” in my phone that I hadn’t really any clue who was calling anymore. I just knew I wasn’t going to answer under any circumstance. Not even after two dirty martinis. Okay, I have responded on occasion to these “reserves.” Sometimes because I’m just too nice and felt guilty leaving them hanging (passive aggressive much?). Other times I’ve just been totally bored in between checking Twitter and Instagram. There have been lonely nights in between relationships with people I actually liked. And sometimes my friends and I think it’s downright hilarious. Call me a mean girl if you want, but your nose may be growing at this very moment. You’ve totally done the same thing. We all have. And whether you admit it out loud or not, I want you to realize that it’s entirely possible that’s what is going on with you and Mr. Perfect.

While it can take women a little bit longer to warm up to a potential mate, guys know what they want almost instantly. They are hunters by nature and when they see something they want, they go for it. Full force. It’s science. A guy can sway us to the other side after a couple of dates by revealing a shared love of cheese, a dark sense of humor, or just general kindness and good behavior. Inversely, a guy can be completely smitten with a girl and she can crash and burn merely by being a bitch. Don’t be a bitch.

I’ve been given a hard time for having fairly high expectations, and while I may be asking a lot for wanting a 6’0+ gentleman with great style, a sense of humor, brains, charisma, love of small white dogs named Smitty and a handle on his personal finances, I don’t think common courtesy is too much to ask. I certainly do expect my potential love interest to have the capacity to craft up a cohesive text message using the proper your/you’re and two/to/too, let alone actually grasp the concept of dialing my telephone number for voice on voice conversation. As a matter of fact, I don’t think any of that is too much to ask- and you shouldn’t either. I have been pursued hard, like verging on restraining order, so, I know the difference between being the “reserve” and the “jackpot.” If someone can’t even take a moment from his or her grueling life (barring he/she is doing volunteer work in a country without telephone wiring or toilets), that person is probably not particularly interested in you. At very least, you just aren’t ranking high on the priority list and well, that’s a problem.

Listen, it may be disappointing to realize you aren’t someone’s ideal match but, there’s no need to beat yourself up about it or shamelessly and repeatedly throw yourself at someone who just thinks you’re “ok for now.” (Remember DBDG?) Essentially he’s doing you a favor by self eliminating. It’s like Darwinian dating. Instead of wasting any more time on someone who doesn’t see how absolutely spectacular you are, you can keep on stepping… right on towards your true “Mr. Right.” (And you should probably throw in a hair toss or two). You wouldn’t jam your feet into shoes that don’t fit (I mean, maybe), so why would you try to force a connection that just isn’t there? All that comes from that is uncomfortableness and corns. Just repeat to yourself, “No answer is your answer.”

So, next time you are staring at your gold iPhone imploringly, just remember that poor ol’ chap you’ve renamed “Never Gonna Happen” and reserve yourself.

xx,

WhyDid

 

Coincidentally saw this video this afternoon post-posting.  All too fitting.

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Jan
27
2014
0


Red Carpet Recap: Up All Night To Get Lucky (and write this post)

slipknot-beyonce-daft-punk-grammysLast night the 56th Annual Grammy Awards were held at the Staples Center in downtown Los Angeles.  The red carpet was covered in designer clad nominees and presenters from Kendrick Lamar to Anna Kendrick all looking to clinch their very own gold sippy cups.  You know who didn’t win a Grammy?  My computer… because it failed to perform.  I’ve been without it since Thursday and fortunately was able to harass the geniuses at Apple enough to retrieve it at 6:45pm on Sunday evening– just in time to chip in my two cents on the evening’s events.  Phew.

To go ahead and get the party started, Beyonce, husband, Jay-Z, and that ass took the stage wherein we all began to feel guilty about the half chewed leftover piece of cold pizza in our mouths.  Perhaps we should all take up “surfing” because it seems to be doing wonders for Beyonce’s body… and love life.  While we’re at it, where can one meet a man who glances at us like we’re the elusive golden unicorn and also happens to be a rap music mogul and doting daddy?

While on the topic of children, teen dream, Lorde was given the duty of taking the stage after Jay and Bey and despite a somewhat spastic start, she nailed her vocals proving that she earned both song of the year and best pop solo vocal wins.  Speaking of nailing it, can anyone explain those nails to us?

But let’s get down to what really matters, the fashion.  The Golden Globes were all about crimson, the SAG’s about blue, and the Grammy’s were primarily comprised of glimmering golds.  There were spatterings of color from blue to orange and another heavy dose of red, and quite a few female icons opted for pants in black.  Madonna and son, David, wore matching Ralph Lauren and oh gawd, she wore a grill.   And shouldn’t her grill match her bedazzled gloves?  And what happened to her British accent?  It seems she’s traded it in for a southern twang… maybe due to her golden grill?  It’s too much for me to comprehend right now.  I ‘m drunk in love… or maybe prosecco.

The ladies who took our breath away have all graced both the best and worst dressed lists in award shows past.  Katy Perry was a vision in (predicted) Valentino, Beyonce in sheer white Michael Costello, a pregnant Ciara in Emilio Pucci, and a tiny Taylor Swift in Gucci.  I was torn on Taylor because there was no denying how stunning her gown was, but the hair and makeup didn’t match in my opinion.  This was her time to be edgy. A slick ponytail and more dramatic makeup would have taken her totally over the top.  Her half assed updo read post Pilates hair to me.  By the way, have none of Taylor Swift’s friends shown her a video of her dancing?  Please do.

On the other end of the spectrum, as adorable and talented as Ariana Grande may be, I’m heading to her house with a hairbrush and some tough love.  If I see her in another half up-half down ‘do, I’m shaving her bald like Britney.  As for the man posing as a roast beef eating Smokey the Bear, it’s a good thing you’re handsome and talented, cause that hat…  It’s got its own Twitter handle for heaven’s sake.  Skylar Grey wore what is essentially a flesh colored Band-Aid and Zendaya, I don’t even know what to do with you.

But for the most part the evening was full of fun surprises like 34 couples being married by Queen Latifah during a Macklemore/Madonna performance and a Ringo Starr and Paul McCartney reunion.  I’m just left wondering where our bad girls of the red carpet, Miley and Rihanna were?  Lady Gaga was also nowhere to be found leaving the fashion shenanigans up to the men and some creepy ass clowns.

Doesn’t Matter if You’re Black or White:

sarah hyland paula patton grammySarah Hyland, Paula Patton in Nicolas Jebran, Judith Hill

Back in Black:

kelly-osbourne-lorde-grammysKelly Osbourne in Badgley Mischka, Faith Evans, Louise Roe, Lorde

White Snakes:

The 56th Annual GRAMMY Awards - ArrivalsParis Hilton in House of Milani, Steven Tyler, Keltie Knight, Iggy Azalea in Elie Saab

It’s a (Wo)Man’s World:

maddona grammysStevie Nicks, Cyndi Lauper, Yoko Ono, Madonna and son, David in Ralph Lauren

Suits and Ties:

miguel kaskade grammysMiguel in Saint Laurent, Macklemore and Ryan Lewis in Mr. Turk, Austin Mahone in custom Sanctuary 28, Kaskade

Gold Album:

rita ora grammysRita Ora in Lanvin, Amber Rose in Naeem Khan, Chrissy Teigen in Johanna Johnson

Get Naked:

kasey musgraves grammysSarah Bareilles Blumarine, Kasey Musgraves in Armani, Brooklyn Haley

Red:

pink-miranda-lambert-grammysTamar Braxton, Miranda Lambert in Pamella Roland, Pink in Johanna Johnson, Gloria Estefan in Gustavo Cadile, Colbie Caillat in Ezra Santos

Channel Orange:

giuliana-rancic-grammysGiuliana Rancic in Alex Perry, Natasha Bedingfield in Christian Siriano

True Blue:

grammys 2014 red carpetAnna Faris in Fitriani, Bonnie McKee in Gustavo Cadile, Alicia Keys in Armani Prive

Outfit of the Year:

best dressed grammysKaty Perry in Valentiono, Beyonce in Michael Costello, Ciara in Emilio Pucci, Taylor Swift in Gucci

And the Winner Isn’t:

grammys worst dressedAriana Grande in Dolce and Gabbana, Pharrell Williams, Zendaya in Emmanuel Ungaro, Skylar Grey Michael Costello

and in case you missed it or just need a reminder as to why you need to hit the gym…

xx,

WhyDid

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