I get scolded quite a bit for being on my phone during dinners and nights out with friends. I quickly remind them that I’m “working.” Which shouldn’t actually be in quotes because I really am. Social Media is bascially a 24/7 job, especially when you work for yourself. However, I’ve taken it down a notch and for those of you who aren’t actually running a business, it’s time to put down your phones. I know that selfie and shot of your salmon seem super important, but your friends are about to disown you if you don’t rejoin them in a little place called reality. So, here are some hard and fast rules for Instagram posting:
- Instagram is basically not real life. Don’t let it consume yours.
- I think a lot of people need to learn the art of self editing. We get that you are somewhere really beautiful or you’re having a REALLY good hair day, or there is a lot going on, but try and pic a COUPLE of the best pictures and spread them out throughout the day. No one likes their feed being spammed by your event. Either that or learn to make a collage.
- We do not need your doctors’ visits, weekly sonogram, bloody wounds, or hunting kills to be forever etched into our brains. A post delivery baby hospital pic gets a pass though.
- I’m really not kidding when I say I don’t want to see your food pictures. Unless what you are about to eat is a slain dragon, I’m just not interested.
- If you’re going to create a meme (good for you), please, dear God, check your spelling/grammar. No matter how hilarious the punchline may be, I can’t get over the fact that you don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re.”
- If you need to use a filter on top of a filter before posting that self indulgent selfie, you probably shouldn’t be posting it. This is Instagram, not Vogue. There’s no need to Photoshop.
- #Hashtagsareactuallyusefulifyouknowwhatyouredoing. Not everything needs to be hashtagged, but don’t hate on others who actually know how to use them.
- Give credit where credit is due. If you love something someone posted, spread the love, but credit the source.
- Please don’t post pictures only to delete them two minutes later. This is Instagram not Snapchat (although there’s now that creepy direct message thing). Don’t post unless you are sure you want to post. Posting something and then removing it two minutes later doesn’t make you look mysterious, it makes you look insecure, and a little bit schizo.
- Clean your damn mirror, selfie queen.
And this one goes out to you… and you… and you…
Now, follow me on Instagram so you can see what I’m wearing.