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The List Volume XXXVIII

By |February 18th, 2011|The List|

I can’t lie, all week long I notice things that are completely and ridiculously obnoxious, but when it comes time to sit down and write “the list” I draw a complete blank.  Looks like I need an assistant.  Anyway, here’s what I came up with this week…

  1. People with SUV’s who don’t know how to drive them.  Seems like the worst drivers are always the ones with the biggest vehicles.
  2. Wasted time. Mine, yours, someone else’s.
  3. Leg 1 of Paris Hilton’s brothel themed 30th birthday parties.  Give it up already. 
  4. The smell of burnt hair.
  5. Drama on Entourage. Why is he so annoying?  Why is he cast? Who owed him a favor?
  6. The sound of high heels that need reheeled.  Take care of that, would ya?
  7. When you smush your lipstick to the of the lid.  It’s never the same.
  8. Guys who are under the impression that they are, in fact, still in college.  Still in a fraternity, as a matter of fact.
  9. Luvs “Heavy Dooty” commercial.  Ew. Just ew.          
  10. Speaking of creepy babies.

xx,

WhyDid

Why Did You Date Him: Deciphering the First Date

By |December 10th, 2010|Why Did You Date Him?, WhyDid Wisdom|

The holidays are a great time to couple up with someone new. With all the parties and the cold weather, why wouldn’t you want someone to share it with and snuggle up to? Be wary though… it’s about quality not quantity. You can size up most guys by the type of first date they take you on. While some guys are looking for that special someone, others are simply looking for a little bit of booty (by that I mean alotta bit). Here’s a breakdown to help you break it down:

  • Coffee Date: This is a joke. I, myself, have never gone on a coffee date. Probably because if someone asked me on such a ridiculous date, I would immediately block his number. Someone who asks you on a coffee date is one of three things: cheap, a cheating boyfriend/husband, just not that into you.

  • Meet for Drinks: In New York, this is a pretty common date. Probably because the city is full of a bunch of alcoholics looking for the BBD (Bigger Better Deal). This one can mean a few different things- He’s looking to get laid and plying you with alcohol is just the ticket. He’s meeting his girlfriend/wife for dinner. He’s not sure if he likes you yet and this is your interview. If he does, you may get the dinner invite after a couple glasses of pinot.

  • Dinner and a Movie: This is just boring and he’ll probably be bad in bed. (*Note: this only applies to the FIRST date).

  • “Group Date”: This is red alert, mayday, SOS shit. There is a much larger issue at hand if your date needs to have his posse with him. This isn’t an episode of The Bachelor and you’re not Vince from Entourage.

  • “Meet me Out”: This is not a date. Getting hammered on promoter’s vodka and grinding to Usher does not a date make. Period.

  • Romantic Dinner for Two: I don’t mean a stop at In N Out Burger. I mean pulling out all the stops- flowers, romance, picking you up, opening doors, chivalry. If he can commit to a quiet dinner, he can probably commit to a lot more.

  • Something Physical (and I don’t mean in between the sheets): Doing something physical and new is a great way for a new couple to bond. There is a reason they have people skydiving and tight rope walking on all those crazy dating shows. A guy who puts some thought into a date is worth keeping around for a second date.

Hopefully this will help you navigate the single’s scene. Dating is not easy- this I know. Another thing to keep in mind: Under no circumstance should a guy ask you out over text message, Twitter, or Facebook. If he can’t pick up the phone, I can’t be bothered. Happy hunting!

xx,

WhyDid

The List Volume IV

By |May 14th, 2010|The List|
Adding Zest Nails on Chalkboard
And so it’s that time again. What irked me and raised my blood pressure this week? Take a look below to find out.
  1. Basketball Wives. Are you guys still talking?
  2. Smoking. You wanna eff up your lungs? Go for it. Making my hair and clothes stink? Now we’ve got a problem.
  3. Two finger typing. There’s a class for that.
  4. Jessica Simpson for OH so many reasons. Not even a cameo on Entourage is gonna make you cool, girlfriend.293.JessicaSimpson.tg.051210
  5. Rachel Uchitel’s vajayjay. Aren’t you tired?
  6. Class rings. (Thanks for pointing this out, GBF). I don’t believe I ever even got one, so why are you still wearing yours? No need to wear your resume on your ring finger, unless, of course, it’s a 5 carat Harry Winston.
  7. Fighting over a boy. Um, Kate, Cammy? He cheated on his wife with a stripper. You really wanna throw ‘bows over this one? alex-rodriguez-stripper
  8. Snooze button. You’re ruining my life.
  9. Gulf Oil Spill (again). Um, come up with any solutions yet guys? Or are we planning a big fish fry I didn’t know about?
  10. The tween boy hair flip. I love that little Greyson guy (who doesn’t?) and we’ve all got Bieber fever, but is that hair toss necessary? Looks like a mild case of tourettes…

xx,

WhyDid