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Red Carpet Recap: American Snooze-ic Awards

By |November 24th, 2014|Celebrity Style, Red Carpet Recap, Why Did You Wear That?|

fergie jlo iggy azalea american music awardsOh, sorry.  I just woke up.  I can only assume that my deep slumber was induced around the same time I slammed my hand to my forehead upon One Direction taking the stage to accept the award for Artist of the Year.  Either that or I had too much wine.  Maybe both.  In any case last night was the 42nd annual American Music Awards held at the Nokia Theater in Los Angeles and hosted by a basically blacked out and slurring Pitbull (Mr. Worldwide, if you will).  While I look back on the evening, I can’t actually tell you who won or gush over any particular performance (except maybe Lorde’s), but there are a few key things I did deduce from the evening.  If you do not already own a leotard, get one.  Without a nary Beyonce, Miley, or Katy in the auditorium, there was no lack of spandex to be seen.  Also, J. Lo and Fergie made the message clear that the old guard hasn’t gone anywhere and a Pilates class sure doesn’t hurt.

As far as the red carpet, there were about fifteen “celebrities” who actually walked it, leaving my options for best, worst, and WTF very limited.  Black was the overall favorite for the evening and the ladies who donned the official color of New York, looked sleek, stunning, and sophisticated whether in long gowns or short shifts.  The skin showing of choice last night was most certainly the legs with sky high slits as well as micro minis.  Green, coral, a bit of navy, and peachy flesh tone were the favored hues worn by songstresses.  Rita Ora was pleasantly surprised to find out that she was the only one wearing a skin flattering yellow frock.

The favored hairstyle for the evening was soft tousled waves more often than not in buttery blonde.  Manicures were more like claws with long pointed tips not to be outdone by fingers covered in elaborate rings on multiple fingers.  Statement clutches and sky high heels finished off the ladies’ looks.

And we can’t forget the fellas.  Wyclef Jean and Imagine Dragons channeled their rocker style in tailored tees and leather, while Aloe Blacc spelled it out for us.  Nick Jonas’ suit made me feel even more awkward than his crotch grabbing Flaunt Magazine spread.  I quipped that I hoped 5 Seconds of Summer were also five seconds from a shower.  Magic looked like lost tourists who had wandered onto the red carpet after a tour of Hollywood Boulevard (rude!) and Sam Smith seemed to have forgotten his socks.

I wonder if Pitbull’s hangover is as bad as mine.

All But Basic Black:

american music awards red carpet black dressesCharlie XCX in Vivienne Westwood, Selena Gomez in Giorgio Armani, Fergie in Halston

jenny mccarthy amas red carpetMary J. Blige, Christina Milian, Jenny McCarthy in Cushnie et Ochs

 Little Babe Dress:

nicki minaj american music awards Nicki Minaj in Alexander Wang, Meghan Trainor in Ted Baker, Lauren Cohan in Blumarine

 Golden Coral:

jhene aiko american music awardsElizabeth Banks in Peter Pilotto, Julianne Hough in Zuhair Murad, Jhené Aiko in Alice + Olivia

 Flesh Take:

jennifer lopez red carpet american music awardsJennifer Lopez in Reem Acra, Selena Gomez, Morgan Stewart

Leggy Ladies:

kendall kylie jenner american music awardsKendall Jenner, Heidi Klum in Versace, Kylie Jenner in Alexandre Vauthier

Micro Trend:

becky g american music awardsBecky G, Lele Pons, Noah Cyrus

All That Glitters:

jordin sparks red carpet american music awardsJordin Sparks in Halston, Olivia Munn in Lanvin, Zendaya

Whatever Suits You:

iggy azalea american music awardsJessie J, Iggy Azalea, Gigi Hadid in Prabal Gurung

Ill Suited:

jonas neyo american music awardsNe-Yo in Anthony Franco, Ansel Elgort in Kent and Curwen, Nick Jonas in Armani

Male Order Babes:

imagine dragon american music awardsWyclef Jean, Imagine Dragons

 Leading Ladies ( DaBest):

taylor swift rita ora american music awardsKate Beckinsdale in Kaufman Franco, Rita Ora in Zac Posen, Taylor Swift in Michael Kors

Led Astray (Dafuq?):

worst dressed red carpet amaBleona Qereti, Frankie J. Grande, Diana Ross

xx,

WhyDid

The List: Volume XLI

By |April 22nd, 2011|The List|

It’s been a while.  Lucky for you, The List is back.  One would think there would be far less to complain about in Pleasantville, but stupid people and annoying habits are everywhere.  You can run but you sure as heck can’t hide.

  1. .Strip malls.  How many different versions of the same thing can there possibly be?  I can’t even tell where I am half the time cause it all looks the same.  I know I’m close when I see Black Angus and Mini Golf World.
  2. Zuckerberg wannabes.  You are not about to the next Facebook.  Sorry.
  3. Brides/bridesmaids wearing cowboy boots at weddings.  I don’t care if you’re from Texas.  This is neither the time, nor the place. As a matter of fact, I’m not sure what that time or place even is. 
  4. Automated voice recordings that make you listen closely to a bunch of options so that your call is directed to the correct person… only to have that person ask you all the same questions again.  No, it’s fine, I had fifteen extra minutes to spare.
  5. The smell of dirt. How do worms live like that?
  6. People who are still speaking “Sheen.”  You just sound like a LOSER when you say WINNING.
  7. Audrina’s new show.  Enough is enough.  Even that killer bod isn’t gonna hold our attention for more than five minutes of meaningless babble.
  8. Girls who brag about their shitty shoe collections.  Steve Madden does not a shoe collection make.  Now, this is a shoe collection: 
  9. Autotune.  When are people going to start singing again?
  10. Malaria.  Monday, April 25th is World Malaria Day. Find out how to help here.

xx,

WhyDid

Happy Ho-lloween.

By |October 16th, 2009|Why Did You Wear That?|

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I love costumes. Give me a reason to wear one and I’m THERE.  Seriously, ask my bf. He’s come home many times to a sassy secretary or desperate housewife.  Well, Halloween is just around the corner, so I thought I’d give some helpful costume suggestions.  I tried to dig up some of my all time favorites of my own, but didn’t have much luck.

For Groups:

Football team (or another sports team): We did this years ago and it was a big hit copied for several years after. We literally came up with a team name (the Vixens), mascot (a fox), and put numbers and nicknames on the back.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Yeah, we attempted to do this one year. While I thought it was brilliant, not everyone was ecstatic about the green unitards from American Apparel.  I still think it’s hilarious and would make an amazing group costume.

Cast of Sex and the City: Kind of tame, but pretty easy to pull off. However, there may be a dispute over who gets to be Carrie and who gets stuck as Miranda.

Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney Kardashian: Tight dresses, padded derrieres, and don’t forget the baby bump for Kourtney.

Bret Michaels and Rock of Love Girls: Um, amazing. Enough said.

Flying Solo:

Lady Gaga: there will probably be a ton of these, but any good reason to wear a blonde wig and leotard should be taken advantage of.

Ana Wintour: (a slutty Ana) is kind of amazing. Get a sweet bob wig and some big black glasses.

Vampire: (a slutty one, obviously). If you aren’t feeling too adventurous, jump on the vampire bandwagon. For some reason, don’t ask me why, people are totally vampire crazy.

Devil in a Blue Dress: This actually came from my mom (clever as always). It’s perfect for a more tame Halloween party or somewhere that you don’t want your entire abdomen showing.  Get a cute blue dress and devil horns, voila!

Couples:

Pam and Jim from The Office: Not particularly sexy, but who doesn’t love Pam and Jim?

Jon and Kate (Plus 8): This could be pretty brilliant. You may have to stop by the local Toys R Us and pick up some dolls, and you will probably lose several throughout the night, but that makes it an even better costume.

Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf: Pretty self explanatory, no?

Each Other: This could be really funny. Dress like each other and exaggerate their characteristics. This could also prove to be very good couple’s therapy.

Happy haunting!

xx,

WhyDid