The List Volume XXXI

By |December 10th, 2010|The List|

Sometimes I struggle with the list… other times it flows like the Niagra Falls. This week it was the latter.

  1. Barbara Walter’s Ten Most Fascinating People. If those are the most fascinating people in our country, I need to move. Jennifer Lopez? The Jersey Shore? I hear the weather in Reykjavik is lovely this time of year.
  2. Wearing glasses with no lenses in them. I get it. You’re so ironic.
  3. Stupid bright colored eye makeup. Save it for 13 year old girls, spreads in Cosmo, and Halloween. You look absolutely ridiculous.
  4. Ringtones. I mean, who actually has their phone on anything but vibrate at this point, but really? Sexy Back?
  5. People who overdo it with the winter gear. I’m talking to you Los Angeles. It’s not that f*#(ing cold here. So remove your puffer, fingerless gloves, and ski hat. Try living in New York or Minneapolis. Then you’ll know what “cold” is.
  6. Brushing your hair in public. That’s just disgusting.
  7. Mariah Carey’s Christmas outfit. God bless her, but come on. You’re not 22 anymore. 
  8. Blogs that simply re-post things from other blogs or post magazine spreads. If I wanted a runway re-cap I’d go to Style.com. If I want to see the new spread in Vogue… I’d buy a copy. It’s called “original content.” Try it.
  9. T-shirts with tacky, intentional holes. Don’t know about you, but I try to get rid of moths in my wardrobe.
  10. Amaze-balls. People who say, “amaze-balls” probably also say “Sunday funday.” Have an amaze-balls Sunday funday, assholes.



The List Volume XIII

By |July 30th, 2010|The List|


Another week, another list. World, you never cease to amaze me!

  1. Tents on the beach. I mean, what are you doing? Camping or tanning?
  2. Speaking of the beach- people who walk too close to our towel and kick sand all over you. Appreciate that.
  3. Fake glasses. You don’t even need glasses.
  4. Sideways hats. You are not Marky Mark and this is not the Funky Bunch.1207057917_7454
  5. Copycats. I know, I know. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, blah, blah. But sometimes it’s just really f#%*@ing annoying.
  6. Letterman jackets.
  7. Naysayers. I say it’s black and no matter what, you’ll say it’s white. It is not constantly opposite day. Cut it out.
  8. Payphones. Seriously, who the eff can you call for a quarter?photo
  9. Dr. Phil. How do you still have a show? Don’t you have your own problems to solve?
  10. The Jersey Shore cast ringing the NYSE opening bell. Our country is officially a joke. 0727-jersey-shore-nyse-00-480x319

Have a wonderful weekend.