While soaking in the sun (and some rose) poolside at Soho House last week, I was startled to see some really horrific footwear that nearly killed my blissfully happy buzz.

IMG00145 scuba

WTF?  I’m sorry, what does one call these? Are they flip flops? Are they socks? Flip socks? I’m confused. Is it hot out? Is it cold out? Did you forget to shave your ankles? Do you have cankles? What is the problem? Please tell me.

You know you aren’t supposed to wear socks with sandals, so why are you trying to break the rules? Would you wear these?


Didn’t think so. The only time I can think these might even be useful are while running home after a pedicure so as not to smudge those freshly lacquered tootsies. But then again… I’D JUST WEAR FLIP FLOPS.  Too cold for flip flops? Then WEAR SHOES. Real shoes. Not these hybrid foot freakshows. (Pretty sure a similar pair made my frightening footwear roundup).

Pick a side. Are you wearing socks or are you wearing flip flops? You can’t have it all.