­

The List Volume 2013

By |December 31st, 2013|The List|

new years time squareThey say the way you spend New Year’s day foreshadows how you will spend the rest of the upcoming year.  Probably not promising for a lot of you who woke up missing articles of clothing, unable to identify your bedside companion, sans cab fare for the journey home, and with a headache equivalent to the explosion of the Hindenburg.  As for me, if today is any indication, I’m all set.  Being handed a mimosa upon parting my eyelids, walking outside outfitted in a crop top, and spending the rest of the afternoon alternating between drinking rosé and napping is something I could get used to.  Certainly an improvement over the last twelve months. 2013 was a hot ass mess… or maybe that was just me.  I basically spent this past year dating completely inappropriate individuals, staying up too late, not working hard enough, and writing it all down.  There are plenty of personal bad habits that I wish to lay to rest along with 2013.  That said, here’s a countdown of some other things from 2013 that I certainly won’t be crying crocodile tears about kissing goodbye.

  1. No, I don’t want to play Candy Crush.
  2. FOMO.
  3. Trainwrecks.  I mean, obviously literal ones, but really figurative ones a la Amanda Bynes, Lilo, and most of my ex-boyfriends.  Can we please stop encouraging bad behavior?
  4. Parody t-shirts.  You know: Féline, Homies, Commes des Fuckdown, and the likes.
  5. Anything with a peplum.
  6. “Keep Calm” and STFU.  Please stop making these.  Along with most some e-cards, and definitely those comic strip things.
  7. The word/action of twerking.  Also, all mentioning of molly.
  8. “DJ” as a fallback career.  When did grasping the general concept of Spotify equate to a paid occupation?
  9. Awl dese cray wayz of mizspelling thangz n stuph.  Idk. Itz nawt kewl, bb, k? Werq.
  10. The exploitation of unicorns.
  11. Miley Cyrus’s tongue.  (Though her explanation to Babs was somewhat endearing).  Let the record show- I’m a Miley fan.
  12. Dubstep.
  13. Leggings as pants.  Seriously.

Peace out, ’13.  I’d be lying if I said I’ll miss ya. xx, WhyDid     image via