gym-behaviorKeeping in theme and wrapping up this week’s fitness focused posts, let’s cap things off with The List.  This particular list is solely dedicated to the most obnoxious gym behaviors that are sure to raise your blood pressure and give that punching bag something to cry about.  I’m sure there are some professional gym-goers who are much bigger sticklers when it comes to gym etiquette, but let’s just stick with the basics, okay?

  1. Any sort of noises.  Grunting, panting, singing along to Bruno Mars- not acceptable.
  2. If there are 15 empty machines, why did you insist on hopping on the one directly next to me?
  3. Though I’ve been guilty, as Stiegler always tells me, girls should not wear grey pants to the gym.  Seeing a sweat stained crotch is so not sexy.
  4. Texting at the gym is one thing, but talking on the phone while you get in your “cardio” is just absolutely absurd.  There’s a “decline” button for a reason.  If your cat isn’t giving birth and calling to tell you as much, there’s no need to be on the phone.
  5. If you’re paying $35+ a class, don’t slack off.  You paid a pretty penny to participate, so do your best even when it’s excruciatingly painful.  As Jenn once said during an especially tricky oblique exercise, “If it’s too tough, well tough. Do it.”
  6. Push up bras under sportsbras.  Not only is that counterintuitive, but seriously?
  7. Do not talk to me while I’m working out.  See these headphones?  They’re the universal “bug off” symbol.
  8. It’s a treadmill, not a runway.  While it’s okay, and frankly encouraged, to wear something nicer than your ex’s holey sweats, a full face of makeup and Pantene perfect hair is taking things too far and pretty much pissing the rest of us off.
  9. So, you’re walking on a treadmill reading an US Weekly in a completely packed gym?  Ok.  Next time, stay home and just swing your legs on the couch.
  10. Did you seriously forget your deodorant?