I’m writing this post from my phone so that I, too, may pretend that my power’s gone out and am facing the wrath of “Hurricane” Irene.

1. New York. Do you happen to be related to the Kardashians? Cause you’re acting like a total media whore this week. First an earthquake now a hurricane?

2. People who wait til they’re ON the plane to eat. No, by all means, eat your burrito on my lap. Want me to hold your drink?

3. Having to pay $7.99 to watch cable TV on a plane. Hey, Continental, you already charged me $25 for a bag, you couldn’t gift me a few House Hunters International reruns?

4. Folks who take credit for “coming up with” something. Just cause you were within a five mile radius doesn’t mean you had anything to do with it.

5. Bad Girls Club. Who watches that? No, I’m seriously asking.

6. Smitty’s breath.

7. Our media outlets amping up anything they can to make a story. You’re making our already melodramatic society even more so.

8. People pretending to have perfect lives. We’re all effed up. Join our club.

9. The phrase, “That’s what I’m talking about!” What are you talking about?

10. Blogging from my iPhone.