Oh Pam…  It’s hard for me to do this, but…


You are no longer the young C.J. Parker of your Baywatch glory days.  Though I must say, you have hung in there pretty well.  There is really not much wrong with the actual outfit itself, it’s just the execution.  The dress is a nice color and your shoes are fantastic.  However, stretch charmeuse is difficult for even the tiniest of women to pull off without weird bumps and lines.


I’m not sure if you are familiar with the term, FUPA, but that is what this is.  Might I introduce you to Spanx?  Listen, no one can rock a one piece the way Pam used to, but sometimes we need to come to terms with getting older and needing to wear shaping undergarments.  No shame in that.

I’m sure it is difficult for a beautiful woman once known as a sex symbol to age, but I sincerely hope that Pam starts to tone it down and age gracefully.  Not going to hold my breath, but it’s a nice thought.