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The List, Volume III

By |May 7th, 2010|The List|

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I mean, I think it’s all of our favorite time of the week… THE list. Did you make the cut?

  1. Brandy aka Bran’Nu. Are you kidding me? Stop. It.
  2. Humidity. Not good for my weave.
  3. Acrylic nails. Are we still doing that?
  4. Boys with highlights. Let’s swap spit, not hair products.
  5. Katy Perry’s light up dress. Talk about a waste of energy.050410-katy-623
  6. Jennifer Lopez’s publicist. She’s doing a great job. Good for J.Lo, bad for us.
  7. Pretty Wild. How did this show not get canceled after the first episode? And why do I not have a show? I can swing from a pole too, you know.
  8. Car bombs. How DARE you try to blow up our fair city.
  9. People who tuck their pants into their sandals. WTF??!!TuckItIn
  10. Being uninformed. If you’ve got 30 minutes for The Hills, you’ve got 30 minutes to at least scan the newspaper. Nothing better than beauty + brains.

Have a great weekend – and pick up the Sunday Times…

xx,

WhyDid

The List

By |April 30th, 2010|The List|
annoying-things
It’s that time again. A week full of things that got my blood boiling. Did you make the list?
  1. People comparing Christina Aguilera to Lady Gaga. Love Gags, but Xtina has been around for over ten years. Come on. No one’s re-inventing the wheel here.
  2. April showers. I better see a LOT of May flowers with the kind of nonsense you threw at us, April.
  3. The Zegerid OTC commercial. I don’t need to see your pudgy white chest. Ever. Got heartburn just watching it. Clever marketing.
  4. Tyra Banks’ jumpsuits.
  5. Tyra Banks.
  6. People’s inability to use the sidewalk efficiently. Again, can someone please write an etiquette book on this?
  7. Oil spills. Ever see a Dawn commercial? Not cool.
  8. Cramps. One of the many joys of being a woman.
  9. The man in the purple velvet blazer who tried to pick me up off the street. See this face? Not interested.
  10. The German Shepard down the hall who licks his lips every time he sees Smitty. He’s not a snack, Kujo. Slow your roll.

Happy Friday!

xx,

WhyDid

You’re On My List

By |April 23rd, 2010|The List|
pissed-off-woman1So, Kingsley did it. I’ve done it before. Today, I will do it again. Just a few things that annoyed me this week.
  1. Kate Gosselin’s weave.
  2. Volcanoes. I mean, really? We have things to do and you’re totes effing up our sched.
  3. Bathroom attendants. I don’t need your help pumping the soap and no, you don’t deserve a dollar for it.
  4. Molly Sims. No reason necessary.
  5. People who talk to me when I’ve clearly got headphones on. I’m obvi trying to avoid all communication with you. Get it?
  6. iPads. Still don’t get it.
  7. The Millionaire Matchmaker reunion show. Reunion shows are bullshit.
  8. Cellulite. I wanna know the male equivalent. Balding?
  9. SJP’s Vogue cover. Why does she look 24? She’s 40+ and we know it.
  10. Shrimp.

Okay, that’s all… for this week.

xx,

WhyDid

10 Things I Dislike ALMOST As Much As Leggings Worn As pants

By |February 12th, 2009|The List|

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I think it’s pretty clear how I feel about leggings worn as pants, but there are more things in the world that disturb me nearly as much.  Here’s the top ten:

  1. True Religion jeans. No need to explain again.
  2. Rude men.  I don’t like rude people in general, but a rude man is the worst.  What happened to being a gentleman?
  3. Blowing your nose in public.  There is a girl who sits near my desk at work and she has been blowing her nose continuously for the past two weeks. It’s taken everything in me not to just spazz out, especially when she ate tuna fish for lunch the other day.
  4. Know it alls.  You don’t know everything. Shut up.
  5. Dried apples. Had a bad experience as a five year old. Have never quite recovered.
  6. Logo handbags/clothing/etc.  It’s so passe, especially during a recession.  We get it, you have a Fendi bag.I won’t lie, I own a Louis Vuitton bag, but I couldn’t tell you the last time I carried it.  I try not to be a walking advertisement. I prefer the understated.  *Note: this rule goes out the window if your logo bag happens to be awesome and vintage.  That’s the only time it’s cool.
  7. Liars.  Maybe it is because I have the guiltiest conscience in the world and probably couldn’t tell a lie to save my life, but I really have a hard time understanding why people lie.  The truth hurts, but it also sets you free.
  8. Fake tans, fake nails, fake hair.  Gross, gross, grossest.  By fake tan, I do mean tanning beds.  I also mean poorly done self tanners.  Cancer and wrinkles aren’t sexy and neither is looking like a tangerine.  I don’t even know where to begin with fake nails and as far as fake hair, do you want to look like you have the same hairdresser as a Barbie doll?
  9. Catty, bitchy, jealous girls and cougars.  I have no time for petty girls/women who lack self confidence.  Please do not take out your insecurities on women who clearly have it going on.  Not our fault you don’t feel good about yourself.  Get a hobby.  That’s a good place to start.
  10. Pilling sweaters.  I hate those little nerd balls.  They never go away, do they?

So there you have it.  Things that ruffle my feathers almost as much as wearing leggings as pants (I’m sure I’ll think of more).  I realize I have just made myself incredibly vulnerable to people coming up to me and blowing their noses while wearing True Religions, but feels good to vent.  Send in some of your very least favorite things.

xx,

WhyDid